YEAH, WE GET IT, YOU’RE WEIRD
09.10.09At some point during Jackass 2 when Johnny Knoxville and Spike Jonze were terrorizing the neighborhood in old person makeup, I’m pretty sure I said, “Oh man, I could watch two hours of just this!” Well, it sounds like Harmony Korine (Kids, Gummo) took that as a challenge on his latest, Trash Humpers, which plays this week at the Toronto Film Festival.
The movie apparently follows a group of elderly people (read: actors wearing old man make-up a la Jackass) who vandalize and terrorize everything around them. It is also partially a musical… go figure. [FilmJunk]
Harmony Korine is on a lifelong campaign to convince you that he’s weird, but after watching the trailer for his latest, I feel like Homer Simpson when he got his giant beer in the Australia episode. I mean, I guess it was pretty weird. It’s just that when I hear a movie called Trash Humpers, I expect there to be some GD trash humping. This barely has trash foreplay. These bait and switch tactics are the reason this country’s in the sh’tter.
ADDITIONALLY: I got a free personality profile from eHarmony Korine once. I didn’t get any dates, but a gay midget poisoned my cats.
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Valtrex is some good Rash Thumpers.
If these “old guys” vandalize a “Neverending Story” van, this thing better fucking win an academy award.
LOL! “VAN-dalism”!
Dumpsters behind sorority houses make fer good trash humpin’! Just mind the bloody coat hangers, young fella!
I think the key part of “I could watch Johnny Knoxvill and Spike Jonze dressed up as old people fucking around for two hours” is the Johnny Knoxville and Spike Jonze part.
“These bait and switch tactics…”
“Bate” and switch is what Pauly and I do on Thursdays…
…and Mondays.
Harmony Korine sounds like the gayest candle in the entire boutique.
I’m pretty sure the last thing I’d be doing in old man makeup is breaking shit. Fucking elders at a retirement home, sure, but not breaking shit.
Harmony Korine isn’t Margaret Cho’s porn name ? Never mind the obligatory *shudder* then.
Harmony Korine is the music that comes from the skin flute.
I don’t know, putting on all that makeup and prosthetics seems like an awful lot of trouble to through just to buy beer.
Hong Kong flu is what Margaret Cho calls it when her gag reflex kicks in and she throws up on Maury’s dick
Harmony Korine sounds like something that would make Harvey Korman yell the correct way to say his name.
The upside of this is that stupid kids who decide to emulate this shit will be mistaken for adults, and prosecuted as such.
I think Korine’s best stunt so far was dressing up like a senator last night and screaming like a toddler in church.
That’s not weird.
*Holds up Paul Hogan’s head sewn onto a squirrel’s body with flashing LEDs for eyes, Sandstorm plays at full volume*
This is weird.
Trash Humpers: the inspiring true story of Arizona State University.
idIDoT: Maury is married to Connie Chung, not Margaret Cho. If you have trouble telling the difference, remember that Connie is only funny when she’s trying to be serious and Margaret is never funny, no matter what she’s doing.
Oops! I crapped the Toronto Film Festival.
“Harmony Korine” is a song you sing into a microphone dick.
When I first saw this title I thought it was a Kirk Cobain biopic.
kirk cobaine is kirk cameron’s and kurt cobain’s lovechild.
Trash Humpers are the PG version of Cum Dumpsters.
I hear that this is just the first chapter in a trilogy.
Too bad, I’m usually a fan of three-part Harmony.
Trash humpers is what you get when you throw a bunch of Viagra pills into a trailer park.
So the good news is that my chilluns doesn’t has the swine flu. The bad news is because my chilluns doesn’t has the swine flu I’s back at werk.
I can’t win.
Oscar the Grouch fucking HATES trash humpers.
Or does he love them? He never told me how he felt.
*lightbulb pops on in head, starts writing script about black muppet titled ‘How He Felt’*
Come on, you are full of win, Swi.
Trash Humpers is what you call a Tara Reid gangbang.
Trailer Trash Humpers are Vannin groupies
If you want to watch old people doing crazy things for two hours, all you have to do is go to a veterans hospital and start yelling BANG!
Trash Humpers usually double bag it.
Trish Humpers are really into the Neverending Story.
Trash foreplay consists of Natural Light, Christmas lights in the summer, and a relative.
Clash Humpers don’t know whether they should stay or should they go now.
Trash Humpers are twice as busy on Wednesday.
Recycle bins are the Trash Humpists’ virgin.
I’ve officially changed the nomenclature of the Trash Humper to the Trash Humpist. Get me this Harmony dude ASAP.
When I gotta jerk it to finish I call that a trash hummer.
If those oldies don’t break out into a musical jamboree featuring Bittersweet Symphony by The Verve this whole concept is corrupt.
Alternate title: The Conception of Oscar The Grouch.
Trash humpers don’t mind their partners Hefty.
I’m a Slayer groupie. Thrash humper.
Typically I’m a trashed humper. What can I say, pussy is better with a tummy full of bourbon
Did you know Nic Cage is more of an Anthrax fan, NoMo. His fav, “Not the b’s! Not the killer B’s!!!’
Something something something about prostitutes . . . Cash Humpers.
Harmony Careen is gay bar karoke.
Who can take your trash humpers out? Stomp them down for you? Shake the plastic bag and do the twisty thingy too? The garbage man! Oh, the Garbage man can!
When you spent your whole career writing screenplays for a 66-year old pedophile that passes his borderline child pornography movies as art, then making a film that only Gary Busey would understand would be the logical next step.
“I expect there to be some GD trash humping. This barely has trash foreplay.”
I recommend you see the avant garde cult classic: 1 Night in Paris.
Crappy, I’m sorry I wasn’t here for your awesome Anthrax comment. You’re the man! You’re the man! You’re so bad, you should be in detention!
If you’re going to talk Canadian film crap, you can damn well bring up “Trailer Park Boys 2: Countdown to Liquor Day”*, Vance.
*in theatres here Sept 25. I will be both drunk and stoned for this.
What? Al? I thought you were as pure as a Jonas brother!
I’m starting an internet dating site for likeminded people (jaded overweight keyboard jockeys who hate sunlight). It’s called MehHarmony.