09.14.09 HAD YOU HEARD? MICHAEL JACKSON IS JESUS.
This is the trailer for This Is It, the posthumously cobbled-together concert rehearsal footage of Michael Jackson, ‘directed’ by High School Musical’s Kenny Ortega. Michael Jackson was a very important person, because, as this trailer reminds us, “His dreams inspired the world.” It’s true. A lot of people don’t realize, the first page of the bible says “And on Day Zero Michael Jackson had a dream about the world, and God spake unto himself, ‘Sh’t, Michael, that’s a good idea!’ Yadda yadda yadda, now we have snuggies and Easy Cheese, and sh’t is pretty awesome.”
Here’s what actually happens in the trailer: Thriller fades in. CUT TO: Michael Jackson’s first appearance, accompanied by celestial opera music.
-”There’s Michael.”
-”The man is here.”
-”We’re all here because of him. And may that continue. With him leading the way.”
Hold on, I’ve discovered the THIS IS IT OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: We took some throwaway Michael Jackson footage, edited it together with some Michael Jackson songs, farted nonsensical clichés on it, added hyperbole to taste, and now you hungry pigs have something to snack on. Mmm-mmm, this trough’s not going to empty itself, now pay me.
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There are 23 comments about:
HAD YOU HEARD? MICHAEL JACKSON IS JESUS.
the last time someone had ‘never before seen’ footage of Michael Jackson it cost HIM $25 million dollars
The Mighty Feklahr’s official synopsis: “Watch us fuck every last penny out of Michael Jackson’s dead freak ass!”
DID YOU KNOW?
To cremate Michael Jackson, they buried him with a Pepsi.
We’re all here because of him?
Seriously? Did Jacko travel back in time and jack off in the primordial ooze?
Wait a minute… that would explain many of todays’s diseases and birth defects, not to mention the entire caucasian race.
He’s still dead, right ? I don’t have to worry about 2000 years of negro bullshit ? The Jewish stuff has just about worn me out.
The Mighty Feklahr feels that Michael Jackson’s contributions to space exploration are often overlooked. In fact, He cannot recall a more frequent moonwalker. IN YOUR FACE, ALDRIN!
Michael’s best career move?
Dirt nap.
DF, that’s not funny.
That’s fuckin HI-larious!
I don’t want to alarm anybody (Fek), but take a look at the woman on the far right side of that screen grab… are we absolutely positive Jackson is dead?
I hear Jesus Jackson has 12-Year-Old Disciples.
Coming this fall to Fox – Michael Jackson’s “So You Think You Can Kid Touch”
IT’S A TRAP!
I FUCKING LOVE ORTEGA!
haha no I don’t
I hear Roman Polanski will be directing The Last Temptation of Jackson Christ.
I’m mature enough to admit that I’m afraid of that man in the mirror.
So what was the Jesus Juice made of?
shudders
The Mighty Feklahr feels compelled to apologize in advance, not only is He hungover^2 from weekend football, but He forgot to take His psych meds yesterday as well.
He feels special today.
Ortega makes Jesus’s taco pop.
That explains catholics.
On a side note, il Tac, your av’s short still gives me nightmares. In a good way.
It’s all for love….L O V E…..W I T H……A….C H I L D….I H A D S E X W I T H C H I L D R E N.
So… What the Hell are the special features gonna when this comes out on DVD? “Even MORE unreleased backstage footage!!”
Every dvd is going to come with a bottle of lube, a quaalude, and some child porn. It’s just like thanksgiving at my uncle’s house.
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