This doesn’t seem like it could possibly be true, but the source looks legit as far as I can tell.  They say Jean-Claude Van Damme has agreed to fight a K-1 muay thai match next March against ’96 Olympic gold medalist Somluck Kamsing.

This rumor was recently confirmed by Kamsing, who signed the contract for the fight on Sept. 4.  The bout will take place in Las Vegas and will consist of five two-minute rounds, said Kamsing.

Van Damme has requested to bar the use of elbows during the fight because he is an actor and does not want his face to get cut or bruised, Kamsing told Siamsport. Kamsing is a Thai boxer who won the featherweight gold medal at the 1996 Olympics in Atlanta. [via FiveKnuckles]

My sources tell me Van Damme took the bout as part of his goal to become the answer to R. Lee Ermey’s Jeopardy question from Full Metal Jacket, “Who’s the twinkle-toed c’cksucker that just signed his own death warrant?”  Now, you may point out that Somluck Kamsing is 5′ 7″, and last competed at 126 pounds.  I might point out that Somluck Kamsing is a professional Thai boxer who makes a living beating up other professional Thai boxers, while Van Damme is a 48-year-old Belgian actor who knows karate. (And is between 5′ 8” and 5′ 10″, depending on who you ask.)  If he’s really worried about his face getting bruised, he should probably switch this match to a tickle fight against Danny Bonaduce in the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese. But watch out, because gingers bite.

 

 

[thanks to wwbd for the tip]