09.24.09 EH OH, I CAN’T GIT NO CELL SERVICE OVA HEAH
Ever since the advent of cell phones, crappy horror movie writers have had to explain how their characters got themselves into a situation where they were isolated from the rest of the world. But as you’ll see in this video, there’s a solution: NO CELL SERVICE! I especially enjoy the ones that felt they needed to further justify there being no cell service.
“No signal. 97% nation wide coverage and we find ourselves in that 3%.”
I know, what are the odds, right? WOOF. Thanks, Google. Anyway, thank Rich Juzwiak over at vh-1 for making this. “Hurrr, my name’s Dick Jizzwhack, I make cell phone videos,” he said when reached for comment.
[hat tip: BWE]
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/10/polanski-ghostbusterguy-150x150.jpg)
There are 25 comments about:
EH OH, I CAN’T GIT NO CELL SERVICE OVA HEAH
Don’t worry, Larry Cohen’s picking up the slack for everybody.
That 3% of the country that’s not covered? My f’n parking garage at work.
It’s a hell of a lot better than the scenes where a character is holding a can attached to a cut piece of string.
My recommendation to assholes in horror flicks? Buy a fucking Satphone
TRICORDER READINZ SHOW SURGE IN BROTOX!
Unrelated but I always thought the Verizon “Can you hear me now” guy looked like a serial killer.
I’d laugh if I didn’t have to hang my head out a fucking office window just to check my voicemail.
No signal in your parking garage? I don’t wanna’ scare you, but there’s a 99% chance that there’s a killer in there.
Cell phone not working? All right, let’s just open this up right here and see what the problem is. Mmm, no, okay - nope that isn’t it. Aha! It looks like you’re starring in Jeepers Creepers 2? Well there’s your gawd durn problem right there. Go get a real job, asshole.
“Oh shit, I ran down my battery watching Mad Men reruns and playing Farkle. Do you guys have a cell phone?”
“We can’t use my phone. I only have these old rollover minutes.”
“THOSE ARE AS GOOD AS REGULAR MINUTES!”
“Hey, psycho killer guy, we’re over here! Kill this bitch first.”
There’s only so many times filmmakers can get away with “I was trying to take a picture of my four-year old’s impressive dook and accidentally dropped my iPhone in the toilet and they wouldn’t replace it.”
Apparently all horror flicks take place in a Faraday Cage
My phone gets no service in my office bathroom, especially when I’m trying to read Penthouse Forum.
No signal in your parking garage? I don’t wanna’ scare you, but there’s a 99% chance that there’s a killer in there.
If it’s Wes Bentley’s character in P2, I’m cool with that. I could use a home-cooked turkey dinner and someone to kill my coworkers right about now.
WHY ARE THERE NO BARS?!?!?! WHY ARE THERE NO BARS?!?!?!
To be fair, that scene in HOSTEL had nothing to do with reception. The character was holding up a photograph on his cellphone and comparing it to a building in the city. This factoid brought to you by an overweight, undersexed, thirtysomething male who has already exhausted his daily supply of baby batter wanking it to Xhamster.
More importantly, why do women always drop their keys when being chased by a rapist/murderer? That never happens on my “dates”. They grip those things like it’s going to save their life.
Fuck, can I get a redo on that?
WHERE ARE THE BARS?!?!?! WHERE ARE THE BARS?!?!?!
It’s weird. There are no bars in Salt Lake City, but I get great reception there.
I just always figured that ch-ch-ch-ch-ah-ah-ah-ah is the noise that an EMP makes.
Michael Bay’s favorite numbers to dial are 9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1,0.
You know all those sci-fi movies about how our reliance on technology is gonna’ screw us over? I think this kinda’ thing is meant to counteract it.
“If you don’t have cell phone service, A KILLER WILL GET YOU.”
Damn phone company propaganda.
Ellen and Portia Del Rossi love to use *69
Nic Cage coins the cell phone self-own
Definitely not a cliche if you have fucking T Mobile. Oooof. Worst service ever. You could set a horror film in T Mobile’s corporate headquarters or directly under their main signal tower and I’d be the first one picked off by the killer with this faulty ass service.
http://putthatshitonthelist.blogspot.com
Comment on this post:
You must be logged in to post a comment. Not yet a member, register for free.