09.28.09 FREDDY EARLE KRUEGER IN WHO CARES PART 10
(Where you going, stupid? All the good stuff’s under the water.)
After the jump, Wolverine’s ne’er-do-well, heroin-addict cousin Freddy Krueger is back in the trailer for the new Nightmare on Elm Street remake from Michael Bay’s production company. Michael is desperate for cash these days, as his C4 habit is up to four bricks a day.
After being burned alive by a mob of angry parents, a pre-school gardener/caretaker named Freddy returns for revenge against the children, now 18 years old, that accused him of sexual abuse. But was Freddy a child molester or was he falsely accused? This is the central question and main addition to the film’s plot. Freddy doesn’t have many lines, but that isn’t all that surprising considering that the film’s producers have said the character doesn’t joke around. [ScreenRant]
So if you were thinking that this is going to be badass because Jackie Earle Haley (Watchmen’s Rorschach) is playing Freddy, also keep in mind that the idea behind it was that Nightmare on Elm Street could be improved by making it more serious. Which is a great idea. I’ve always said this would be better if the plot hinged on whether the guy that kills people in their dreams was a molester. Also, I think if you’re rich enough to go to a pre-school that has a full-time white gardener, you deserve to get molested every now and then just so you don’t get a big head.
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There are 17 comments about:
FREDDY EARLE KRUEGER IN WHO CARES PART 10
So am I allowed to get revenge or not?
Leave it to Hollywood dipshits to turn ‘Nightmare on Elm Street’ into a parable about how the real evil is the death penalty.
If Michael Bay makes a movie about white guy who sells oranges, Pauly is going to be PISSED.
was he falsely accused? This is the central question and main addition to the film’s plot. Freddy doesn’t have many lines, but that isn’t all that surprising considering that the film’s producers have said the character doesn’t joke around.
Oh fuck this. The original worked because the character was an unsympathetic character who was constantly cracking sick jokes.
Michael Bay’s Freddy krueger refers to firefighters as “nancies”
The original worked because the character was an unsympathetic character who was constantly cracking sick jokes.
That’s the same reason this blog works.
In the next film, Freddie invades a psychologist’s dream to receive help and ends up with a prescription for Prozac.
Michael bay thinks flame retardant means “pyrotechnician school flunkie”
Actually Donk, the original worked b/c it contained a crossover from Death Bed: The Bed That Eats People.
Classic.
Michael bay thinks Great White really know how to rock
Fred should never have mixed business and pleasure. Always do your molestin’ in a large van (mural is optional but advised), plenty of room and allows for a quick getaway.
Michael Bay thinks that Molotov cocktail’s are supposed to be served at Jewish weddings.
In Cauchemar sur la Rue d’Elm Freddy Krueger flees to France living happily ever after.
I’m sorry, but Freddy is hot. And JEH makes my tralala tingle.
I think a better film would be Michael Bay burning Chad Kroeger alive, and him staying dead.
RoboPanda says: “Oh fuck this. The original worked because the character was an unsympathetic character who was constantly cracking sick jokes.”
That’s false. He never cracked jokes in the original film. Wes Craven designed him as a dark and morbid character and only later directors turned him into a comedian.
Hey, Jamie Kennedy, “Scream” was awhile ago. You dont need to be in character forever.
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