Entertainment Tonight recently did a piece on Diablo Cody’s Jennifer’s Body and something something something MEGAN FOX AND AMANDA SEYFRIED LESBIAN KISS!!! Luckily the lesbian kiss (also the name of a cover band I used to play in) comes just 12 seconds in, because the rest of it is like watching Death Proof over and over with the car crashes cut out. “Please, tell us more about your character, Evil Cheerleader #4, I’m fascinated by her psychology.” Amanda Seyfried (who’s playing a character named “Needy”, apparently), actually manages to come off dumber than her Mean Girls character. It’s like she has ESPN or something. And then Diablo Cody shows up wearing heart-shaped sunglasses and a leopard-print trench coat to make me regret ever defending her. Please tell me that’s a costume. It looks like she’s interviewing for the Katy Perry detective agency.
[via CinemaBlend]
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Imagine that, a former stripper with horrible fashion sense. Excuse me while I pick up the pieces that used to be my world view.
The Katy Perry Detective agency caught the girl. And it liked it.
Juno fucking sucked.
Best advice that my older brother ever gave me: “Remember, no matter how hot a girl is, EVERYBODY takes a painful shit at some point. You have to remember that.”
People who like Diablo Cody should be forced to wear David Wright’s batting helmet so they don’t hurt themselves.
Fox Exec 1: Did he just say “Katy Perry Detective Agency?”
Fox Exec 2: Yes he did.
Fox Exec 1: Get me Vince Mancini, we’re buying the film rights to that blog post!
Fuck the kiss, I want to see the full Requiem for a Dream flashlight party scene.
[not really]
Liar! Fuck you moral compass, fuck you in the ass with a redwood fucking tree! FAG!
non dissmisive hand job gesture
The Katy Perry Detective agency caught the girl. And it liked it.
FALSE! The Katy Perry Detective agency catches only AIDS.
I was wondering when Hollywood would rediscover the vampire genre.
I know you guys want to bone Megan Fox, but for every hot chick you want to fuck, there’s a guy who’s already sick of her shit (presumably because his mouth has been grafted to her anus by a respected Siamese Twin surgeon).
This is the movie that they made to call bullshit on all the guys who ever said something like “I’d swim through a river of shit just to lick Megan Fox’s toothbrush”.
Well, hot shots, can you sit through a shitty Diablo Cody fingerbang just for the promise of seeing more of Megan Fox?
Oski, want is flying the jet in your avi?
So, does Megan get her Ferrari washed in this movie or not?
I love Diablo Cody’s originality; the way she dresses, writes and expresses herself is exactly NOT like every female employee at Borders.
Wait, was the cover band named The Lesbian Kiss or Luckily the Lesbian Kiss?
I just want to know what kind of music you gays played.
heheteehe *splooge*
That was the gayest lesbian kiss I’ve ever seen.
I love you, Crappy. Not just the “we were sharing a tumbleweed and accidentally touched the tips of our dicks together and made eye contact” kinda love either.
New up with more crack
TRUE STORY: Entertainment Tonight use hair brushes as their microphones.
Megan – “This is a REALLY original screenplay … um, it’s like a REALLY original … movie … and (brain freezes) … it’s different than anything I’ve ever seen that’s DEFINITELY been out in the last 10 years …”
Producer – “Damn it! I told you not to film her talking for that long.”
Camera – “I can’t help it.”
Megan – “I think it’s INCREDIBLE that it was written by a woman and directed by a woman and … is starring two women!”
“Im going to eat your soul….”
And purge right afterwards.