I love David Lynch almost as much as I hate people who insist on trying to explain his movies.  Oh, so The Cowboy was a metaphor for his subconscious, huh?  DAVID LYNCH LAUGHS AT YOU, CRETIN!  Anyway, he recently had an art show in Santa Monica, and from the sounds of it, his art can best be described as “David Lynch-y.”

Thirteen mixed-media works, measuring up to 6 feet high and 10 feet wide, are gritty, witty and every bit as twisted as you might expect.  “Oh . . . I Have a New Shirt,” a big, mostly beige piece that packs a punch, depicts a man with extraordinarily long arms grasping a folded shirt in a cardboard box, as if he’s showing off a gift. But in the lower left corner of the painting, a woman lies in a pool of blood. The top half of her body is out of the picture, but what’s there is not a pretty sight. She’s still wearing black spike heels, but her baby blue skirt is hiked up, exposing a bare rump. A hand-lettered sentence above the corpse informs viewers: “my girlfriend died last night.”

“Oh… I Have a New Shirt,” “My girlfriend died last night” — coincidentally, those are the last two entries in my day planner.  I would’ve also appreciated a “Heineken?! F’ck that sh’t!”   Additionally, Lynch was careful to note that he would’ve moved to Europe once, if not for the lizards.

“We were going to Salzburg to study with Oskar Kokoschka,” Lynch says of the Austrian Expressionist he never met. “We went there. It was so clean, I couldn’t stand it. So we went over to Paris. Then Jack wanted to go to Portugal and I wanted to go to Athens because this girl I liked was going there. We flipped a coin, I won and we went to Athens. We took the Orient Express down there. That was really fantastic. But then I woke up one morning in this really cheap hotel in Athens, and there were about 15 lizards on the ceiling. I said, ‘I don’t know, I’m not going to be able to work here,’ so we went back home.” [LATimes]

Because the lizards steal your thoughts, you see.

(Thanks to Robo for the tip)