08.24.09 WOODY HARRELSON AND THE TEEN PROSTITUTE
(This spy gear doubles as a sweet bong.)
Below is a clip from Canadian superhero drama Defendor. Yeah, they actually spelled it that way, which is odd, because I assumed Canadians would spell it defendeauxr. Woody Harrelson plays a vigilantee with no superpowers wearing a homemade superhero costume who befriends a teenaged prostitute (Kat Dennings). Oh, sure, he does it and it’s slightly endearing, but when I put on a cape and long johns and chat up teenaged sex trade workers, I get disinvited from Thanksgiving dinner. That’s fine. Whatever. I don’t like oyster stuffing and football anyway. Dawson and I will have our own Thanksgiving dinner at Arby’s. You’re not invited, Mom!
~ robopanda
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/08/harrelson-zombiland-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/08/zombieland-zombiestripper-150x150.jpg)
There are 23 comments about:
WOODY HARRELSON AND THE TEEN PROSTITUTE
P.S. Holy sex offender registry, Bongman!
So it’s a Canadian remake of ‘Taxi Driver’?
You talkin to me, eh?
Unless he defends her from AIDS by lecturing her about the dangers of Johns riding her bareback, this movie is gonna toss a sweaty sumo wrestler’s salad after a volcano taco buffet.
My homemade crime-fighting suit has a lot more fur and sequins on it. Of course the only crime I fight is leash-law violations and my only weapon is to show dog owners what can happen to their pets if they disobey the ordinances. I’ve been called a “vigilante”, a “loose cannon” and a “dog rapist”, but you can just call me Bird Dogger.
When Woody Harrelson picks up stray prostitutes, his motto is “Grass, grass, or grass.”
Nobody takes my vigilanteing seriously anymore. Stupid baby bjorn.
Teen prostitutes are confused when you say “Hello Kitty”
Does he choose the tween or the hard place?
tap tap
this thing on?
Teenage prostitutes put the pimp in pimples.
What? I don’t really get it, either.
Teenage prostitutes are only streetwalkers because they don’t have a driver’s license yet.
Teenage prostitutes turn on the red nightlight.
If you ask a teenage prostitute for a blow job, she most likely will ask you for some more bubble gum.
A teenage prostitute will gladly toss your salad. She’s on a diet, too!
A teenage prostitute thinks that ‘turning tricks’ is what she learns in gymnastics class.
Is this the same thing as Matthew McConaughey playing a stoned surfer in a movie. Did Harrelson even know he was being filmed when they made this?
It seems like it could easily be true to life.
Teenage prostitutes aren’t so much ladies of the evening but ladies of the afternoon. Fucking curfew.
*rolls eyes*
Teenage prostitutes are happy to take off your SpongeBob Square Pants.
When a teenage prostitute leans into your car and asks you if you want to party, she’s probably just looking for a ride to Chuck E. Cheese.
Teenage prostitutes can’t help giggling like schoolgirls at Woody’s name.
Harrelson.
Tee hee hee!!!!
How does this, a Canadian movie about a Canadian superhero and a Canadian teenage prostitute not warrant an EH tag? Eh?
“The Hardly Boys, two young wippersnappers with a knack for solving mysteries. The Hardly Boys in….WOODY HARRELSON AND THE TEEN PROSTITUTE”
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