THE ANDY ROONEY OF FRUITY WEIRDOS
07.17.09
Is it just me, or does Daniel Radcliffe seem like the guy at the party at whom you smile and nod politely while trying to back away as quickly as possible?
“It’s wonderful. I grew up around gay people my entire life, basically, that’s possibly why I’m quite camp, and some people think I’m gay when I meet them, which I think is awesome. It’s always good to keep them guessing [laughs]. I don’t go on any blogs or chats or anything, but my friends are demons for them, and apparently someone said “Daniel Radcliffe is gay. He’s got a gay face!” [Laughs] I really don’t know what a gay face is. But I think it’s wonderful that Dumbledore was outed as gay … Half of me thinks Jo Rowling just did that to see if she could piss off the right wing, but I’m not sure how true that is. I think she had it planned, I think she always knew he was gay.” [MovieFone via Vulture]
Man, talk about a Dumbledork. It doesn’t help that I imagine everything he says in the tone of “Look, Mothah! Oy made strawbry pudding!”
Fact: Ryan Gosling tried to be friends with Daniel Radcliffe and even he gave up after two weeks.
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In Daniel’s defense, his face only looks gay when his mouth is wrapped around a dude’s “magic wand”.
…some people think I’m gay when I meet them…
Keep it up with the pink clothes and accessories, that’ll help for sure.
A CANUCKS FAN WANTS HIS AUTOGRAPH??? BAH!
You know how I know he’s gay?
He uses the word “camp” to describe himself
Just because you like to fuck horses doesn’t mean you’re gay.
It’s not gay if one of you is dressed like a chick, or if you’re really drunk. It is gay that he’s Harry Potter and that he’s Daniel Radcliffe, however.
GUy’cha! Hey, Radcliffe, nice suit! Does it come in 5X…err…He means, hetero?
nom-wurd
Fag-bashicus!
I prefer to envision him with a cockney accent: “Snog ya bum for a schilling guvna?”
I don’t know what a “gay gace” is either, but I bet a picture Daniel Radcliffe’s face is the only definition at Urban Dictionary.
Look, I have nothing against homosexuals, but I fucking hate Harry Potter fans, so I hope this guy gets AIDS and dies.
Is gay face like black face?
I think she’s tremendous.
To anyone who got that reference: either you’re gay or a chick or a gay chick, and we can be friends. See you at the meetings. I’ll be the one holding seven toaster ovens.
You know how I know he’s gay?
His dick tastes like shit
You know how I know he’s gay?
He rides a stick while another is in his hand.
You know how I know he’s gay?
He was delighted to find out his head-master was gay
If he wants to be gay, it’s his choice, whatever, but good luck. Even ugly gay people have a hard time getting laid. And he’s a real CockerDaniel!
If you made it through that, you passed the test, congratulations! You now have access to my funny jokes.
You know how I know he’s gay?
He is the only one who still hasn’t seen Emma Watson’s vagina.
[Editorial sidenote regarding the "gayfaces" tag: it's always singular even when applied to groups. Remember that for next time you click past an episode of American Idol.]
You know how I know he’s gay?
He blew me
You know how I know he’s gay?
He casts spells with jazz hands
Nom, you’ve got funny jokes?
You know how I know he’s gay?
He frequents a bar called ‘The Sorcerers Spellbook’
that was the joke erswi, that was the joke.
He’s got a gay face!
Again, in Daniel’s defense, a penis had juuust penetrated his anus, sans lube.
I always thought a gay face had a dick in it’s mouth
I thought for a minute that he was one of those guys who just acts gay to attract chicks, but nope, he’s one of those guys who just acts gay to attract dudes. Say what you will, but that is pretty edgy.
You know how I know he’s gay?
He didn’t even TRY to look at my boobs. And they’re right here!!
*points to abdomen*
Rupert Grint’s mug is the Mendoza Line of gayface. Radcliffe is batting way below the Mendoza Line.
You know how I know he’s NOT gay?
Those eyebrows.
You know how I know he’s gay?
He went to a co-ed boarding school for seven years and never went on a panty run
you know how i know he’s gay?
actually i don’t but i definitely think he is.
Those eyebrows.
Why, just because it loos like Nia Vardalos is squatting on his face? (which is still ghey, btw)
Is there a denial anywhere in that whole fruity statement?
To Daniel Radcliffe in real life, “Mudblood” is what happens when you break a guy’s ass cherry without using any lube.
4 out of 5 straight men agree, Daniel does have a gay face.
The 5th man was Filmdrunk commenter “BadKarma”, who thought it was a picture of Rachel Dratch.
It’s always good to keep them guessing [laughs].
The only time it’s good to keep someone guessing about your sexual orientation is when you’re picking up a girl from her parents’ house and a condom falls out of your wallet in front of her dad.
On second thought, that’s probably not a good time either…
Ryan Gosling thinks Daniel has a gay face. That just means he looks happy. And that is a good thing.
You know how I know he’s gay?
He wears a fanny pack to the gay bar
You know how I know he’s gay?
His patronus is a fucking unicorn.
You know how I know he’s gay?
Once you go Jack, you never go back.
Daniel had better be careful. Don’t British people smoke fags?
YKHIKHG?
Zac Efron gave him that shirt because it was too foppish.
You know how I know he’s gay?
He subscribes to Gay Men Who Portray the Titular Character in Wizard Movies Quarterly magazine.
[Picture Caption] Take note as the young Radcliffe catches the scent of homo-erectus, or, as it is commonly referred to, a gaping mangina… Let’s watch.
YKHIKHG?
He lost out on the Machete role that ultimately went to Danny Trejo. Man up, Radcliffe.
So what then? Is this dude gay or whut?
Maxwell, please stop speaking in Klingon.
The Mighty One will be upset with you.
You know who’s not gay? The dude sporting the fuzzy wristband. That’s all man right there!
When he gets older, Daniel Radcliffe is going to have a gray face.
If Daniel Radcliffe is the Andy Rooney of fruity weirdos then Andy Dick must be their Saddam Hussein.
You know how I know he’s gay?
His robe has a flap in the back for easy access
When Daniel Radcliffe was an alter boy, the priests loved his pray face.
You know how I know he’s gay?
I’m always attracted to the gay guys. They’ve got it going on. Daniel has a big dong and a horsey :(
It looks like Daniel Radcliffe invented the world’s first “Groucho contacts”
If Daniel Radcliffe is the Andy Rooney of fruity weirdos, then David Blaine must be their Jesse James.
If Daniel Radcliffe is the Andy Rooney of fruity weirdos, then Michael Jackson must be their David Carradine.
If Daniel Radcliffe is the Andy Rooney of fruity weirdos then Perez Hilton must be their Geraldo Rivera.
If Daniel Radcliffe is the Andy Rooney of fruity weirdos then Tom Cruise must be their Kim Jong-il.
If Daniel Radcliffe is the Andy Rooney of fruity weirdos then John Travolta must be their John Travolta.
For fuck’s sake, Radcliffe. The Harry Potter mirage makes more money than God and this cunt’s pursuing the pink pound now? H’mm? *Lightbulb moment* How about a book about a young, confused, celibate cyborg vampire wizard?
You’d figure a gay face would have at least one brown eye…
*takes a long draught of piss out of Pauly’s bedpan, hit’s the nurse call button and starts to undress*
You know how I know he’s gay?
Nickelback is his favorite band
NICKELBACK?!
Them’s fightin’ words!!!
Gosling:Hey Girr…Daniel, Let’s be friends.
Radcliffe: Why I’d love to be your friend Ryan! Hey, look at these naked pictures of me whilst I’m fucking a horse on stage!
Gosling: *Cough* Um, heyyyyyyyy, uh, that’s um…..ok.
Radcliffe: Ha ha! I made you uncomfortable and confused about my sexuality, isn’t it ever so much fun?
You know how I know he’s gay?
He haunts my dreams
You know how I know he’s gay?
He dumped an Asian girl with a British accent for a ginger who looks like his best friend.
I like to think this improves my chances of nailing Emma Watson. This and the gun I’m waving around.
In the banner pic, Radcliffe looks like Ricky Gervais with AIDS.
You know how I know he’s gay?
He gave Rupert Grint a reacharound while chanting “Wingardium Leviosa.”
Prelubus sphincterosa!
You know how I know he’s gay?
He always wants to have his wand in his hand when he meets voldemort
You know how I know he’s gay?
Because Vince implied it in his post, that’s why.
*looks forward to winning CoTW for sucking up*
Daniel Radcliffe: [walks out of dressing room] How about this face?
Pauly: Meh…too Zach Quinto.
Daniel Radcliffe: [walks back in dressing room, changes, comes back out] How ’bout this?
Pauly: Ewww…too Christian Bale.
Daniel Radcliffe: [walks back in dressing room, changes, comes back out] How ’bout now?
Pauly: Hmmm…it’s good but it needs something.
Daniel Radcliffe: Here! [jacks off dude, dude finishing on his face] And now?
Pauly: Perfect!
Rachel Dratch has been playing Daniel Radcliffe since she left SNL. The real Daniel is about 500 pounds, living in his Mom’s basement, playing WOW.
Pauly, Daniel Radcliffe is not The Dude’s special lady. Just his ladyfriend.
C’mon guys, he just uses the gay stuff to suck up to his fan base.
Actually, I wasn’t trying to imply that he was gay, just really awkward and dorky.
Vince, you have to admit, he’s got a gay face.
Ron and Hermione burst into Harry’s room, where they found him standing, staring at the fire, his back to his friends.
“Harry, there’s a Quiddich practice about to start,” exclaimed Ron.
“Shut up Ron, there are more important things to worry about,” interjected Hermione. “Like the Evil Curse going around school.”
Interrupt me one more time and I’ll shove my ‘evil curse’ down your prissy little mouth, bitch, thought Ron.
Hermione continued. “Seriously Harry, students are being put under some kind of…Harry? Harry? Are you listening?”
But Harry didn’t turn around. He stood there, as if made of marble. The firelight flickered over him, its motion illuminating his stillness.
Ron and Hermione moved to face him, and gasped in tandem. They were too late.
For though Harry’s body was still the same, his head had been replaced – by Neil Patrick Harris’!
-excerpt from Harry Potter and the Curse of the Gay Face
Walter Cronkite, wow. I thought he was already dead.
TengoDooter said: “You know how I know he’s gay? Because Vince implied it in his post, that’s why. *looks forward to winning CoTW for sucking up*”
Vince said: “Actually, I wasn’t trying to imply that he was gay, just really awkward and dorky.”
Yeah yeah, like you were actually going to let me win anyway. No denial of what you implied was really necessary.
And besides, chinomoreno always wins anyway. I wonder why???
I knew it! They’re having an affair.
(Bitter, much?)
Al, there is more to chino than you know. Just between you and me check this out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pyl6a1afqvM
I doubt it. And I’m not opening that link.
Oh okay, COMRADE AL! Apparently you are in on it too.
I haven’t won in forever and I sucked this week so you take that back!!
I only have a minute to reply because I’m watching movies so I can try to be more on topic when I comment. (did you know Marsha once got hit in the nose by a ball and it got all swelled up?)
If you sucked this week then no doubt chinomoreno-3.l4 will be here soon.
Hey Vance, do you know if this was the premiere in London, England or London, Ontario? Cuz that Canucks logo on the fuzzy wrist band seems really out of place.
WHO IS KEYSER SOZE?!?
Yeah I’m drunk and The Usual Suspects is on. Fuck off.
You’re drunk? Please don’t drive.
As a matter of fact, hand me the keys you fucking cock-sucker.
I ALREADY GAVE THEM TO YOU HALF AN HOUR AGO!
yeah… who’s drunk?
“…Ontario…Canuck….wrist…”
Now I know who Radcliffe looks like in that picture.
GRETZKY!!!
That suit and that face screams “I like it in the pooper”.
Exhibit B: The T-shirt he is wearing at the bottom of the page.
Exhibit C: Butt plug (not pictured)
Tengo, I saw what you did. You so crazee.
@chino
I don’t make the news, I just report it.