NEW POSTER FEATURES PILE O SKANKS
07.07.09
Sorority Row looks about as good as a movie starring two reality show vets and a child of celebrities could possibly look, and now it has a poster. And I’ve been sitting here for the last 20 minutes trying to think of a joke that doesn’t involve Rumer Willis’ face being longer than Jamie Chung’s back, but I got nothing. Sorry, Jesus.
[via IMPA]
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/monsieur_lazhar__ver2_C-Tates-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/Julia-Roberts-and-Armie-Hammer-in-Mirror-Mirror-2011-Movie-Image-600x354-150x150.jpg)
This poster makes me feel like the Kool-Aid Man is busting out of my pants.
They are supposed to be dead prostitutes, right?
My skank piles never look that lively.
Too slow. Dead whore FAIL! :-(
Hey, who the fuck was taking pics from inside the trunk of my car?
If those girls were all Mexican, it would hit way too close to home for me.
Ha ha! I love you, Snatches!
Wow Chino. I think I’m in lust.
I keep a heap of these in my backyard. Yeah, it’s smelly at times, but you should see the size of my tomatoes this year.
Just as a word of advice: If you think one of your dead hookers might just be faking it (I’m looking at you, Briana Evigan), pee on her face. If she blinks, you’ve still got work to do.
/One To Grow On
Vun Washed up B-Movie stars, Two Washed up B-Movie stars, Three Washed up B-Movie stars, Four Washed up B-Movie stars,
Five Washed up B-Movie stars, Six Washed up B-Movie stars
SIX, SIX Washed up B-Movie stars
Gaggle of geese, pride of lions, murder of crows… I’m gonna dub this one a Mound of Sorority Girls.
Looks like this time…
The girls really are stacked against us.
YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!
I haven’t seen a pile of girls like that since that one time Nick Jonas toweled off and threw it into the crowd at that one….concert….I wasn’t…front row at….
WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!
*points into the distance and runs off*
Jamie Cheung thought the photographer was terribly insensitive until a stagehand explained he wasn’t addressing her as “Yu Luong Chin.”
And ya’ll laughed when I bought my Skank-O-Matic. Well, who’s laughing now?
Sorority, Rho?
Sorority Roe goes for a pretty penny amongst middle aged, barren women.
With 6 girls lying on top of each other, Sorority Row isn’t the only thing that will be “Coming Soon.”
Cause of her face, Australians now call it a “Rumer-rang”
How about this:
Rumer Willis walks into a bar. The bartender says “Why the long face?”
How about this:
Rumer Willis walks into a bar. Rocky Dennis asks “What in thE fuck is wrong with her face?”
Jay Leno had an affair with Demi Moore?
I heard that Rumer Willis and Ron Perlman once walked into the Smithsonian and one of the guards had a heart attack thinking that the Ben Stiller movie was real.
Sorority Hoes.
Rumer Willis wears a quilt over her face when she robs banks.
*Donk walks in dressed as a French fur-trapper*
Sacre’ bleu! Dis ees the most worthless pile of beaver pelts I’ve ever seen!
I heard Rumer Willis is going to be Mac Tonight for Halloween…..and every single day after that for the rest of her life.
I’d caption it “The Amityville Whorers”.
You can’t turn a whore into a housewive, but you can turn a pile of them into a house.
These skanks got confused when the photographer said that the poster would involve both Rumer Willis and bareback.
I find when I have a load of dirty skanks, nothing helps clean them like Clorox Bitch.
This is the only feasible way for everyone to watch The Hills when your chapter can only afford a 13″ tv.
You can’t turn a whore into a housewive, but you can turn a pile of them into a house.
Which reminds me, if I keep staring at this picture, all their faces are going to be load-bearing.
Missing from poster: Bleary eyes and glazed faces.
i liked this when it was called jawbreaker.
oh wait. i didn’t like this when it was called jawbreaker.
oops.