07.24.09 NEW MOON COMIC-CON CLIPS EXPLODE OVARIES
Here’s a couple clips from the Twilight New Moon presentation at Comic Con. As you might imagine, you can only hear about half the audio over the squealing of the fangirls, not that it matters. In the first one (above), ethnic werewolf Taylor Lautner and his ridiculous Lorenzo Lamas wig is all like, “Hey, let’s do something ridiculously cliché!” So he teaches Bella Swan to ride a motorcycle, which is like a metaphor for his greasy ethnic sex appeal. But Bella crashes because she can’t handle it. She needs the gentle, fake love of her sparkling-white vampire who can’t touch her, only listen to her stupid teenage emo whining and share meaningful looks. Then Taylor Lautner takes off his shirt to wipe the blood off Bella’s head, which is a metaphor for all the girls in the audience who just menstruated for the first time.
Matt from WarmingGlow puts it best: “I’d rather have my daughter end up a stripper than one of these bitches.”
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/02/TaylorLautner-Stretch-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/01/Runaways-slides-ratner-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/01/TWilightManga-real-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/01/Superpoop-Twilight-Inglouri-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/01/dioDragon-150x150.jpg)
There are 20 comments about:
NEW MOON COMIC-CON CLIPS EXPLODE OVARIES
So these clips caused an eggsplosion?
My daughters want to see this movie so bad. I’m having a pole installed in their room ASAP.
I’d rather have Matt’s daughter end up a stripper, too.
All the gravitas of Herbie : Fully Loaded. Add my squeals to the mix.
Twilght 2: Twitardeder
So they showed this at Comic Con? What a brilliant idea. I, for one, think that the hardcore comic freaks and the twihards deserve each other.
Well, they are all virgins El Dub.
Comic geek to Twihard:
Lets see if your purity ring will fit on my penis.
I never thought I would have to say this out loud, but for the sake of all of us we need more little girl kidnapping, raping, strangling serial killers. And we need them now. We have to thin out this herd.
These wolves travel in fanny packs.
The first step in teaching a girl to ride a motorcycle is buying her a vibrator with training wheels.
Al is learning to ride a motorcycle?
He’s wearing the Lorenzo Lamas wig so you know he’s a renegade.
*air guitar*
Hi Eibz!
*slides New Mooncup down bar*
What does the offspring of a fake Vulcan and fake vampire look like? Rumer Willis?
Tim Tebow is a HUGE Twilight fan!
Someone should have Twilit that place on fire.
@Fek: You obviously mean the movie, not the book. As a Gator, it’s pretty obvious he doesn’t know how to read.
sharing meaningful looks?! that’s dick horian’s forte! i call bullshit
I was doing the dismissive hand wank, but then Taylor took his shirt off and my cock mysteriously ended up in my hand for 5 minutes. Only half of what I just said is true.
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