Here’s a couple clips from the Twilight New Moon presentation at Comic Con.  As you might imagine, you can only hear about half the audio over the squealing of the fangirls, not that it matters.  In the first one (above), ethnic werewolf Taylor Lautner and his ridiculous Lorenzo Lamas wig is all like, “Hey, let’s do something ridiculously cliché!” So he teaches Bella Swan to ride a motorcycle, which is like a metaphor for his greasy ethnic sex appeal.  But Bella crashes because she can’t handle it.  She needs the gentle, fake love of her sparkling-white vampire who can’t touch her, only listen to her stupid teenage emo whining and share meaningful looks.  Then Taylor Lautner takes off his shirt to wipe the blood off Bella’s head, which is a metaphor for all the girls in the audience who just menstruated for the first time.

Matt from WarmingGlow puts it best: “I’d rather have my daughter end up a stripper than one of these bitches.”