Yesterday Kevin Smith took to his Twitter to give his fans and near million followers just what what they want: a graphic, disgusting mental picture of his tubby ass having sex with his wife. He tweefed (I’m trying to get “tweef” recognized as the verb form):
Ten years in and we bone like we’re cheating on each other WITH each other. A decade-plus and her clit/brown/taint-area still pOwns my dick.
To which he later added:
On a roll this week: we’ve f-cked twice a day every day since Sunday. With little fanfare I’m trying to make it a solid four weeks straight. [via Videogum]
But time out, what does “clit/brown/taint area” mean? The slashes seem to indicate that it’s all one place. So I ask: did Kevin Smith’s wife’s vag, taint, and butthole areas all merge into one mega orifice, the way San Diego, Santa Barbara, and L.A. became San Angeles in Demolition Man? Does Kevin Smith’s wife have a gaping hybrid hole? And if so, is that the secret to a happy marriage? I guess I just don’t understand this romantic stuff.
[and yes, that's Kevin Smith's wife in Playboy. Uncensored version here.]
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Shouldn’t you have a birthday cat for such photoshop work?
Kevin Smith calls his going-down move the Silent Bob.
I hear he colloquially refers to her clit/brown/taint area as “L337 H4XX0R \/\/ou|\|d”
See, this is why I’m non-committal about Twitter. On the plus side, you have Olivia Munn describing her hotsauce shits and “redhotpooper”, but on the down side you have Kevin Smith writing 140-character Penthouse letters. I need a philosopher to tell me, is the one worth the other?
Do hybrid holes qualify for Federal tax credits?
From the sounds of it, she doesn’t wipe very well.
I must have hybrid genatalia cause I pissed poop this morning.
But that always happens when Chodin spends the night.
I’m just going to stare at the banner pic of the previous post and pretend this one never happened.
It would appear that the porno Zack and Miri made may have been of the scat variety. Not that I have any familiarity with that.
/clears cache
Patty I’m with you. Smith’s wife shared enough of herself with us (and her scary boobs) in Clerks 2. I’ll just stare longingly at Cooper and Reynolds.
It’s only fitting, cause if a twat and the shitter combined, it would be called a “Twitter”.
The lawyer for Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie just filed a restraining order against any more sex talk about Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
It helps that she calls him Matt Damon and he calls her Rosario Dawson while they fuck.