(Hugh couldn’t believe it was really Suze Orman)
In a high six-figure deal (you’re kidding me, right?), guess which studio (hint: it’s Fox) bought a comedy pitch from Hitch writer Kevin Bisch called Avon Man. Hugh Jackman is attached to star.
Story follows men laid off from an auto dealership. One is reluctantly recruited into becoming an Avon salesman, and while the experience is initially emasculating, he uses his charm and good looks to become a top seller. The comedy takes on a “Full Monty” vibe when the car salesman sets out to save his financially strapped family and town by conscripting his buddies into the makeup business to win a regional contest. [Variety]
I imagine how this went down was, in the middle of a Fox meeting, someone stood up and shouted, “Hugh Jackman… as an AVON LADY!” Then confetti fell from the ceiling accompanied by kazoo sounds and monkeys throwing sh*t at each other.
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Oh good, he’d be really good at marketing Avon brand Adamantium Polish and sideburn cream
Up next for Fox, see Tony Jaa starring in a film about a down on his luck Alpaca farmer who finds his real calling wearing a surgical mask and chatting up fatties and welfare recipients at the local Wal-Mart.
THE MANICURIST hits the bargain DVD bin next Tuesday.
“a high six-figure deal” for a comedy pitch? H’mm. *strokes chin, puts thinking cap on* A cleaner with a heart of gold, literally. A firefighter who’s scared of cats. A sanitation engineer who can only see in the infra red spectrum. A hotdog vendor who witnesses a mob hit and sells hotdogs. A taxidermist who falls in love with a racoon and tries to bring it back to life with the help of his caveman sidekick, Dave…
My guess is Jackman’s character gets the idea when he hits the belly of the whale and winds up drinking nail polish remover instead of mouthwash by accident
Dammit Br0nze! Now it’ll be another three years before we have a chance at anything decent from Fox!
I’m kidding. We won’t ever have a chance at anything decent from Fox.
This seems like the best time to plug my Adam and Eve Fantasy Party. i’ll even show you all how a man can use the Eager Beaver and get the full effect!
The porno version of this would be Fantasia Man
Arnold Schwarzenegger as a down on his luck pest control worker. Coming Fall 2012, The Ex-Terminator.
Well, this oughta help quash those gay rumors!
If Hugh Jackman’s selling, I’m buying.
They bought a pitch from Kevin Bisch of Hitch? Sonuva Bitch…
Hugh strikes me as the type of guy who would enjoy a facial.
Not that this isn’t a shitty idea. Because it is.
Full Monty vibe? Does Kurg sell these at his Adam and Eve Fantasy party? I’ll take 2.
Hugh’s gonna be pissed when he realizes that it’s the Mary Kay salespeople that get to drive the pink cars.
“Avon calling! I’m the best there is at what I do!”
Hugh Jackman will only get 75% of his usual salary for this role.
This doesn’t really change anything. Husbands will still have to come to terms with having fucked their wives’ Avon dealers.
He could have maintained a little bit of dignity by going the Amway route.
Don’t go drawing parallels between this and Full Monty unless there is actual full montiness going down. Ya big tease.
N’up
the true repressed gay that has realized that photoshops has not understood the plot of this film
Wanna rephrase that comment so it makes fucking sense?