Bright Star is a film starring Abbie Cornish and Ben Whishaw, from The Piano director Jane Campion, about the romance between poet John Keats and Fanny Brawne, “an outspoken student of high fashion.” The film was much loved by critics at Cannes, who I don’t trust for a second. Here are some out-of-context audio snippets from the trailer:
- “Mr. Keats knows he cannot like you. He has no living and no income.”
- “He was a dreamer… she was a realist.”
- “But every word he wrote… inspired the rapture of first love.”
- “…a romance, that would live forever.”
- “You taught me to love, you never said only the rich!”
- “There is a holiness to the heart’s affections, you know nothing of that!”
- “Based on the true story of a brilliant poet, and the BRIGHT STAR who was his shining light.”
- “I almost wish we were butterflies, and lived but three summer days.”
As it turns out, poets and fashion students were just as insufferable in the 1800s. Tuberculosis FTW.



if i submit a video of me screwing a prostitute, will it be considered artistic at Cannes leading to me getting a major release deal?
What was The Piano about again?
starring Abbie Cornish and Ben Whishaw
Guy’cha! If they cast Ben Roethlisberger instead, they can adapt the famous TV repair scene: “If anyone asks you, you fixed my television. You fixed my television. Now go!”
“He was a dreamer… she was an insomniac.”
Well duh, of course we know this is doomed from the onset.
This looks awesome!
“…she was a realist, with a nice rack. He was… he was… Hold on. Can anyone actually quote any Keats? Thought not. Not that brilliant then is he.
But Charlie, every word he wrote, even the prepositions, inspired the rapture of first love.
The shit hit the fan when a ne’er do well named Freddie macked on Fanny Brawne.
I almost wish you were butterflies too. Because you’d be dead in a few weeks.
Somewhere, sometime, Rotty is punching himself in the balls.
“You taught me to love, you never said only the rich!”
It was implied, dumbass. It IS that obvious.
I own many tomes of poetic literature, as a matter of fact, I have a pair of Keats.
If it got him laid then fair play. I’ve just had a whizz through John-Keats.com to see if i recognized any. Nope. A few picked at random read wetter than a haddock’s bathing costume.
Anagram for “Bright Star”: HR’s Tit Grab
Honestly, if I gave a shit about writer’s lives, I probably would’ve learned to read. Yeah, that’s good. Type that for me Abu. No, not this you idiot, the first par-
I can’t blame him, I’d like a chick with a brawn fanny.
Cannes is a stick bug that lights up a cigarette and sighs for about a week.
True story: “He has no living and no income” = my last three boyfriends.
I think I’m doing this wrong.
Are you all kidding?
La Belle Dame Sans Merci, Ode to Autumn, Ode to a Nightingale, Ode on a Grecian Urn, Ode on Melancholy — for starters.
Keats was pretty solid.
“He was a dreamer… she was a real bitch.”
- my last relationship
“But every word he wrote… inspired by the rape of his first love.”
- in regards to Pauly Dangerously’s comments on FilmDrunk.
…a romance, that would live forever… LITERALLY!!1
I dunno Lester. If we were playing Romantic Poets Top Trumps and you had Keats and i had Byron… you wouldn’t have Keats for much longer.
i just read somewhere that abbie cornish is a vegetarian which is kinda shocking cause i could have sworn she ate roast beef flaps
“On First Looking Into A Campion’s Humdrumery”
Charlie, I’d place Shelley, Byron, Blake and Wordsworth above Keats. But Keats is still solid.
Guinny stabs a phillips screwdriver into the back of his hand and remembers one more he is alive.