06.19.09 ‘ZOMBIES ARE A LIBERAL PARABLE’
Zombies are dead people that come to life to eat brains and get shot in the head. We’ve been making zombie movies since the 60s, but only because they’re such a powerful metaphor! A metaphor for, uh… ANYTHING. Paul Waldman recently wrote about the phenomenon for the American Prospect (via the NYTimes), and as you can imagine it’s totally not a pointless thought experiment!
Apart from the extreme violence, is the zombie genre fundamentally liberal or conservative? Does its increasing popularity serve anyone’s political ends?
Oh please, Paul Waldman, tell me the answer! All this time I’ve been wondering whether they represent abortion or the welfare state or gay Republicans or dickbags who can’t write!
I would argue that at its heart, the genre is a progressive one. It’s true that fighting off the zombie horde requires plentiful firearms, no doubt pleasing Second Amendment advocates. And in a zombie movie, government tends to be either ineffectual or completely absent. On the other hand, when the zombie apocalypse comes, capitalism breaks down, too — people aren’t going to be exchanging money for goods and services; they’re just going to break into the hardware store and grab what they need (and if you think your private health insurer is going to be paying claims for treatment of zombie bites, you’re living in a dream world) [Haha, good one, Jay!]. But most important, what ensures survival in a zombie story are the progressive ideals of common cause and collective action.
Every time someone starts a statement with “at its heart” I secretly wish they’d get stabbed in the heart. Is that irony? In conclusion…
[Thanks to Fek for the .gif]
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/09/facepalm-starscream-150x150.jpg)
There are 22 comments about:
‘ZOMBIES ARE A LIBERAL PARABLE’
Zombies are definitely a parable for dickbags who can’t write. Their numbers are increasing at uncontrollable levels, not a single one of them has an original thought, and they mainly seek to attack and destroy the brains of normal people.
Also, shooting them in the head is extremely satisfying.
This post is too smart for me to comment about, so I’m going to head back to the Olivia Munn .gif to
think about my lack of knowledge in civic and public issues and how they are metaphorically connected to moviesjerk off.We keep making Zombie movies for the same reason we keep making Porno’s: Because they’re cheap as hell and people like seeing someone get splattered on the face.
The zombie plague has already been unleashed. It’s called Twitter.
I could go on about how the progressive ideals of common cause and collective action are not owned solely be either set of prevailing political ideologies nowadays, but I’d prefer to comment on how much I’ve missed Geroge Washingto.
This post killed Eli Roth’s boner while giving life to George Romero’s. Very much like a zombie movie, this is a parable to the death of youth culture ideals in a human giving way to older, traditional ideals as the human matures. Also, that’s what a professor told me when he put on Dawn of the Dead so he could fuck my Mom in peace.
Liberal in the sense that it destroys the entire country and culture, and humans will be reduced to eating leftover twinkies? We’ll find out in about 3 years I suppose.
I prefer to use the ‘I Am Legend’ parable to support my Nazi leanings in which the main way to survive is to be genetically superior to the common infected.
I must be a Zombie cause all I think about is your Mom giving me brain.
Hey Paul Waldmann, maybe when you’re done you can tell me if this giant wanking motion you inspired serves anyone’s political ends….
Personally, I think it’s a parable for first amendment expression, but I can see where you might interpret it as support for gay marriage. Now stop staring at my junk.
C’mon, I’m too fucking stoned to be thinking right now.
Yeah, can’t we get a post about Step-Moms or something easy? Like your real Moms.
A post about zombies that requires us to use our brains. Oh sweet irony.
I sewed a bunch of zombies together to shield me from sunlight. Now zombies are a literal parasol.
I didn’t post this to make you guys think, I posted it because it made my eyelid twitch and I wanted to spread the overwhelming desire to punch the shit out of whatever this guy’s name is.
There are two things you should never bring up in polite conversation. I know one of them is politics and I’m pretty sure the other one is zombies.
Why does everything have to mean something else? It’s like talking to a teenage girl.
How many liberals does it take to kill a zombie?
10. 9 to die, and the fastest (preferably a nubile hottie) to go find a conservative with a gun.
It wouldn’t be ironic if the overwhelming desire to punch the shit out of whatever this guy’s name is got to a large group of people who mindlessly shambled towards his house wanting nothing more than to destroy him. But, it would be fucking awesome.
Don’t sweat it, Vince.
I do all my thinking when I’m taking a shit.
Eibz, why in the hell would you ever want to TALK to a teenage girl?
That is why the hippie communes always persevere in these movies.
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