WHAT THE HELL IS THIS
06.17.09Here’s a homemade music video of Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin,” starring Ellen Page, Alia Shawkat (aka Maeby Funke from Arrested Development), and uh, some fat guy. Apparently it’s dedicated to Page’s mother Martha (??), and if nothing else proves the stars’ ability to annoyingly sing a half step behind the beat of the song. Anyway, I’m not sure what the point of this was. Maybe it was to see whether they could finally play out “Don’t Stop Believin,” which has been able to maintain semi-ironic popularity for an absurdly long time now. And speaking of semi-ironic, Ellen Page is rocking both a Che hat AND a keffiyah scarf, which is like +20 hipster points. I’ve heard if you get 25 you can redeem them for getting knocked off your long skateboard.
I got through two minutes. See how far you can get!
[via BWE]
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I’m willing to bet that guy’s name is Bill Arnett.
Fat people are much more talented then Ellen Page. Thank you for bringing this to our attention. How many filmdrunk users are fat guys?
Is it just me or does she pronounce words when she sings in a strange French-Canadian accent that i have never heard anyone outside of Celine Dion have? I just checked and Ellen was born in Nova Scotia, so she by all accounts shouldn’t have a Celine Dion accent.
<——This guy, sad panda. This guy.
Let’s make a hilarious video together Pauly! I will go to my local thrift store to buy hipster costumes.
Do i get hipster points for recognizing Har Mar Superstar before confirming with the “some fat guy” link?
*starts uploading video of himself in nothing but an athletic supporter singing Berlin’s Take My Breath Away into the mirror while holding a melting ice cream cone*
I made it 1:18. But that was a video over on Pornhub. Tomorrow I’m aiming to push it to an all-time best of 1:20.
Singing in a throaty voice with an intense look on your face is a great way to make fun of the fact that you can’t actually carry a tune or a beat.
“Total Eclipse of the Heart” by Bonnie Tyler. Is my pick.
PS- Har Mar Superstar does earn you points.
You guys will be laughing out the other side of your ass when He starts the “Fat Persons Sit In Protests”!
Juno and pals need to get puched in the gut.
We’re all fat guys in here. Especially me.
Accent? What accent??
I probably lose points for not actually knowing “Don’t Stop Believin’” and always thinking it’s actually “Don’t Stop Thinking About Tomorrow” whenever it gets referenced.
I think the Fat Guy might be Bobcat jr.
hipster points for the scarf and hat yes but they lose points by signing a song that isn’t lo-fi, progressive, brazilian banjo beats laid down over incoherent, static-infused garage pop lyrics.
You have no idea how right you are, Charlie.
Fat guys actually hate the smell of wine and cheap perfume.
To regain points just become a “Singer-Songwriter”. It is super easy. You just have to buy a guitar!
Al, It seems like she pronouncing the beginning of words the way Celine Dion does, but that could just be because my computer has french-Canadian speakers.
Buy an original Nintendo. Then tell yourself how awesome that is!
Al it was mostly when she was hiding in the bushes around 2:40 seconds into the video. Shit i didn’t realize how far I got into this damn thing.
They get extra hipster-irony points for being named Page and not singing Led Zeppelin.
Holy fuck. I don’t have speakers and I got exactly ten seconds into the video. I tip my hat to you other brave souls.
WTF, you got to the 2:40 mark? I only made it to 10 seconds. That was painful.
“When Dumb bitches get an apartment together in Hollywood” A Documentary.
This hasn’t got as many views on YouTube as the video of me running down an alley, topless, in slow motion to “Eyes Without A Face”….
Ellen Page should lose points for almost having the same name as Elaine Page.
i’ve masturbated to or with all three of those retards at one point in time. quoth the pisspants, “nevermore”.
I think Hipster points are now redeemable on iTunes now.
I bailed at 1:37, and I’d rather be Rodney King for 81 seconds than relive those 97 seconds again.
This is the alternative to hard drugs for young actresses. Now I understand why Lindsay Lohan is the way she is.
I think I win….
I x’d out at :10 seconds.
True story: this is what I sound like when I sing that song.
That’s why my performances are limited to the shower.
I’d rather watch my parents 69 for 4:16 than watch another ten seconds of that video.
…though I have to say, I bet I could show Ellen Page the worst 97 seconds of her life.
Donkey Hodey make me laugh out loud!
38 seconds then Deepak Choprah showed up
“WTF, you got to the 2:40 mark? I only made it to 10 seconds. That was painful.”
That’s what she said.
[hook enters from stage right, grabs Crappy by the neck and drags him into wood chipper]
I’d only watch this video all the way through if you told me that Sir Ben Kingsley showed up dressed as Ghandi at the end and cunt punted Ellen Page.
I will start a petition to get this video put onto the IMDB. That should wreck their careers.
Is it wrong that Ellen Page going after that dude’s junk in Hard Candy is top shelf in my spank bank?
I’d rather watch the video of Chastity Bono strap-on raping me in my sleep twice than this video.
Hell, I’d even make popcorn.
I am going to build a time machine to go back to the past so I can abort Juno’s baby.
Wait….Chastity Bono strap-on raped me!??!?!
Will she be able to get an erection after the surgery or is the penis purely aesthetic? I mean can she get it up her self or does she have to like rubber-band it to a ruler?
I’m pretty sure it’s inflatable/deflatable, sad panda.
That gives new meaning to the term “blow job”. Seriously baby I can’t get it up otherwise!
Don’t worry I’m truely disgusted with my self for getting all the way through this video. after about 40 seconds it was just so awful i figured their had to be a punchline or something at the end. There isn’t. It somhow keeps getting worse every second.
I lasted for 20 seconds, then I popped. By “popped”, I mean “Punched the monitor with my fist at the sight of Ellen Page.” And then I came at the thought of punching Ellen Page.