06.30.09 RYAN GOSLING IN A TUXEDO SHIRT

“Haha! I love the rose on my chest cause it’s close to my heart….just like you.”

Haha, just kidding girl. I would never wear this to your Twilight prom in Forks. Wouldn’t that be so silly?

I got you a screen-print of a corsage to wear so you don’t feel underdressed, baby.

Ryan Gosling really thinks he should have shaved for this occasion.

No, girl, I like it and it was so very thoughtful of you, it’s just that I’m more of a cummerbund type of guy. Vests remind me of biker gangs and those guys are scary.

Haha! This was so funny in 1982!

Ha Ha! I want to be formal but I’m here to party, Patches!

Haha! See, the pants don’t match the jacket! How wild is that!

Hey girl, I chose short sleeves so you’ll only have my arm to hold.

Yeah, this shirts a little small… compared to my heart.

He looks Sizzler appropriate. Am I missing something ?

Hey girl, I had to wear this shirt because I spent all my money on your corsage.

Dude, what’s up with Baby Sloth’s eyes?

hey girl, I have a rare psychological condition which forces me to always look slightly to the left of a camera whenever someone takes a photo…girl.

*giggling devilishly*

LOL, IT’S A RENTAL! Oh, I know. I’m so bad!

I don’t wear real bow ties ever since Carraddine died–respect.

No girl, I’m not Seth Meyers. But thank you for asking.

[suavely]Gosling. Ryan Gosling. I’ll have my shirley temple shaken, not stirred. Why don’t you let me hold your hand and take you to a nice restaurant, Moneypenny?

Not pictured: Ryan Gosling’s chastity belt boxer briefs.

Ryan Gosling wears this as an undershirt just in case he passes a wedding and there’s nobody to give the bride away.

Not pictured: an ounce of human meanness.

Hey girl, this is what happens when I try to do my own laundry. I’m so lost without you.

Haha! No, I don’t need this Life Alert necklace, I just wear it in case somebody else does. I miss you Grammy.

That square in my wallet? That’s just a wet nap, girl. You don’t know where that door handle has been.

Sorry to be morbid girl, but I want to be buried in this. That way I still look dressed up, but I’ll use up less resources that way and it will be better for the environment.