06.11.09 JJ ABRAMS PRODUCING MISSION IMPOSSIBLE IV
J.J. Abrams wrote and directed Mission Impossible III, which was supposed to be a big deal at the time, but it only grossed a disappointing $134 mil domestically on a $150 mil budget (though it eventually made almost $400 mil worldwide). I always assumed that was because by the third film (after a second one directed by John Woo featuring a motorcycle joust fight – God that movie sucked), no one cared about the Mission Impossible franchise anymore. 
Nonetheless, word on the street is that Abrams is back as producer for a fourth movie. From TV Guide (via SpoilerTV):
“I am incredibly honored that Tom (Cruise) has invited me back as a producer on Mission Impossible 4. says Abrams. “Tom and I have come up with a really cool idea we are pursuing.”
That idea? Tom Cruise must travel back in time to find the source of all the lens flares. (Tom’s thinking alien spirits).
Related Asylum Poll: How can JJ Abrams make MI 4 watchable? Mmm, you smell that? I stepped in synergy.
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There are 23 comments about:
JJ ABRAMS PRODUCING MISSION IMPOSSIBLE IV
Mission Impossible 4: Your Dad Will Watch It On TNT.
Take a good close look into the eyes of the cat and then Cruise.
Where do you see the most intelligence. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I rest my case.
Man, that sounds like an Impossible Mission 4 JJ Abrams!! Right, guys? Like the title…like……puns…
Hello, Ethan.
Your mission, if you choose to except it, is to stop believing in the insane ramblings of a dead con artest…
Not play yourself in every film you’ve been in…
Release Katie Holmes from her Wolfenstein like dungeon…
Reveal to the world that your daughter Suri is in fact an advanced android used to distract from your homosexuality…
And stay the hell away from Brooke Shields.
If not, your ego will self destruct in 10 seconds.
Knowing Hollywood naming conventions, get ready for “The Mission is Impossible”, or “Impossible Mission”.
Mission Impossible 4: Not Remotely Plausible Mission.
Listen, I make fun of Mission Impossible movies a lot, but that’s only because I hate Tom Cruise and thought 2 was so bad I didn’t bother seeing 3.
Mission Improbable At Best
Every Mission: Impossible movie should start with Tom Cruise bartending at Cocktails & Dreams and saying, “No no no, Phelps. I told you I was done with that life.”
LOL! I’m going to do a photoshop of Gandalf standing in front of the
TrogdorBalrog and call it “Mission Impassable!”Fuck you guys.
In that pic, JJ looks like he’s wearing a pair of Groucho glasses, sans mustache.
More like Mission InPaul’sanal.
When asked for comment, Katie Holmes said “HELP ME!!!! PLEASE!!!!! WHAT DAY IS IT? WHAT YEAR!?!! HELP!!!!!!”
Mission I’d Kinda Rather Sleep In Today, Thanks
Studio exec: “Tom, getting people to keep watching this crap is impossible.”
Tom Cruise: “You people told me that playing sand volleyball in jeans was impossible, but I made that happen.”
Studio exec: “No, Tom. We didn’t say that was impossible. We said that was fucking gay.”
Mission Meh.
JJ ABRAMS PRODUCING MISSION IMPOSSIBLE IV
It will be out as soon as J.J. can find a decent rib place to get the necessary material for the script.
HurrggggPlop! TIME TRAVEL TO SAVE XENU.
Ethan Hunt(M:I1): Red Light! Green Light!
Producer: Um…sorry Tom….we’re gonna go with Red Light.
I think Serious Cat just turned into Seriously? Cat.
Mission Impossible: Tom Cruise reaching his copy of Dyanetics when the maid puts it on the top shelf.
It’ll just be Tom and Katie’s honeymoon video edited, titled “Emission Impossible”
Lawrence Fishburne(M:I3):I’ll bleed on the American flag to keep the stripes red.
No joke here. I just can’t believe that was actually a line in that movie.
I’ll piss in his Gatorade to keep it yellow.
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