06.28.09 COMMENTS OF THE WEEK
How best to sum up this week in the comments section? We laughed, we cried, we came up with 459 imaginary Zac Efron movie titles. And for that I thank you. I love you, commenters, as much as this guy <=== loves dolls (though probably not as much as he loves crapping in a diaper).
The way COMMENTS OF THE WEEK works is: at any time this week, when you read a comment you think worthy of recognition, YOU nominate it by copy and pasting it in the comments section below. I pick the winner from among the nominees the following Sunday/Monday. (To help you find it more easily, the nomination thread is always linked in the ABOUT section).
Now for the fun part. We begin in MICHAEL BAY HATES BLACK PEOPLE, SUBTLETY:
SmokeEmIfYouGotEm says: Michael Bay doesn’t just burn crosses. He wraps them in Semtex and firing gel and rigs them with a remote timer.
Then we move to THE LAST AIRBENDER TEASER thread:
Stinky Peet says: “The Last Airbender” is what I call the night I almost OD’ed on nitrous oxide.
Then we go to TRON MAN FORCED TO SELL PLANE, not that the following comments had anything to do with the post in which they appeared:
JHC says: Hee hee. When you italicize a frowny face, it looks like Kirk Douglas. ;-(
Pauly Dangerously says: JHC! JHC! Check it out…. ;0 <—— Terry Schiavo
Pauly Dangerously says: B()_ That’s my “Stephen Hawking drooling”.
ChinoMoreno says: ( <—- Angelo Mendoza
Yeah, I didn’t get that last one either, until I realized Angelo Mendoza is the kid whose father ate his eyes. +10 for depravity. Though in related news, he’s regained partial sight. See? Always a silver lining. Next we move to the ZAC EFRON MOVIE TITLES thread. My original post actually had nothing to do with Efron movie titles, but you guys took the concept and ran with it, and I like that. My two favorites:
Maxwell Demon says: The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill and Came All Over Another Guy’s Face
El Topo says: You’ve Got Male
Next we go to AMELIA EARHARDT BIOPIC. I’m actually second guessing myself for not naming this one the winner.
ChinoMoreno says: (Amelia texting her BFF) OMG!!! I’m flying! LOL!!1!11!!!
*CRASH*
Then we move to the DAYBREAKERS TRAILER, a movie about vampires farming humans for their blood:
Påüłÿ Ðąηgęrσűşľγ says: Americans used to farm humans back when slavery was the cat’s pajamas
I admit I chose that solely for the phrase “cat’s pajamas.” Probably because I imagined it visually. Anyway, time to choose this week’s winner. It wasn’t spit-take funny, but it was well said. Eloquent, even.
TheSheepMafia says: Christ. Michael Jackson (50) dies of a heart attack and David Carradine (72) is dies because of a weird sexual fetish. Who’d have seen THAT coming?
In-effing-deed.
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There are 55 comments about:
COMMENTS OF THE WEEK
Congrats, you dicktuckers.
J, quit fucking around with the setups. Just go balls in.
No offense to TheSheepMafia, but … wtf?
BOOSH!!!
I need to quit procrastinating when it comes to nom’ ing comments. There was some funny ass shit in that Efron post.
FilmDrunk: It’s the pussy’s PJs.
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/michael-jackson-bruno-scene-cut-permanently
Donkey Hodey says: With deference to Farrah Fawcett’s death, filmmakers have decided to cut out another 70% of the movie before theatrical release.
Holy christ I need to stop posting drunk. My god, my grammar is just fucking awful here. I’m sorry that won everybody. That was totally my fault.
@Sheep: I thought Vince would have fixed it if it made it. Maybe he thought it was funnier with the bad grammar for some reason.
Donk should be on a tourist bureau for this one on http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/i-am-number-four
A fifteen year old boy moving to Ohio to avoid predators is like a mouse moving into a barn to avoid owls.
Påüłÿ Ðąηgęrσűşľγ turns up the heat on Vince
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/forbidden-reality-trailer#comments
Vince’s mouth is too lazy to say his R’s correctly, but if you were Vince’s mouth you’d be lazy too.
^^^^^^^^^^ if we are taking that one sexually… if not then it’s not really funny and I’m just perverted
“Taking it sexually” is the only way I roll, bane.
haha… touche pauly… you’d find a sex joke on a gum wrapper you would…
Damn, I feel like “The Machine” Levine finally getting back on the Cadillac board. In conclusion, me.
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/jerry-lewis-directing-nutty-professor#comments
ChinoMoreno:
The Broadway musical of the Bill Clinton biopic, The Nutty Dressmesser.
I can’t nom at work so..
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/orci-kurtzmans-next-project
Pauly:
Orci and Kurtzman are the real life Bert and Ernie.
‘Cept they fuck.
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/smurfs-3d#comments
Donkey
Papa Smurf made Smurfette shave. Said he got tired of eating the Smurf n’ Turf
Donk tickles my racist bone with this from http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/guillermo-del-toro-afraid-of-dark
Donkey Hodey says:
“Don’t be afraid of the dark” is the new slogan for Atlanta’s board of tourism.
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/american-werewolves-in-london-again&cp=1
Chino Moreno:
Werewolves from London have especially scary teeth.
second chino an’ der ‘orrible bad teef mate
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/yoostar-rock-band-for-movies#comments
Donkey Hodey says:
So if it’s technically a game, that means there’s a way to fail the scene, right? I’m guessing there’s also varying levels of difficulty. Like in ‘easy mode’, you act alongside Keanu Reeves and in ‘hard mode’ you have to pretend that you can take Mark Wahlberg seriously.
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/twilight-prom-forks-washington?cp=2
I’m beginning to think Chino is somehow cheating at this.
ChinoMoreno says:
In order to keep these emo kids from hurting themselves, this year’s prom will be relocated to Sporks, Washington.
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/twilight-prom-forks-washington?cp=2
Burnsy, of course:
Prom night took a turn for the worse when a few Persian Twilight fans were beaten for fear they were werewolves.
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/ryan-gosling-in-a-tuxedo-shirt
Burnsy:
That square in my wallet? That’s just a wet nap, girl. You don’t know where that door handle has been.
http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2009/06/ryan-gosling-in-a-tuxedo-shirt
Chodin:
“Hey, come on girl, you know that I can’t kiss you right now. I totally saw you take a sip from that Sparks and, well, it just wouldn’t be right for me to take advantage of you.”
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