06.17.09 RED DAWN PALICKI BOOM BOOM DOWN

Surely there’s a way this can be combined with High School Musical 16 or whatever number they’re on.

I’d rather play Russian Roulette with a semi-automatic than watch this.

I’m pretty sure “Red Dawn” is a reference to waking up to period blood all over the sheets.

If not, it fucking should be.

And the Oscar for Best Actress with a Merkin in a 1980’s remake goes to…

*opens envelope*

Adrianne Palicki for Red Dawn!

I am against this. I state that for the record so I can tell god that I was against it from the very beginning. Probably won’t matter though, if I fail to stop it.

God also want’s me to tell you guys that it’s your christian duty to travel back in time and kill Christian Bale before he becomes John Conner.

Looking at these pictures too much leads to Red Dong.

Rae Dawn Chong should be in this.

Zac Efron has signed on to a project with Chris Stokes combining TAPS and Toy Soldiers. The story unfolds when Zac’s soldiers come to life and tell Zac that the only way they can win their epic battle is through a Jazz dance off.

Hahaha, silly screenwriters. The communist invasion has already started. That’s why I have my own garden and spend the afternoons on the roof monitoring Obama supporters through my scope.

“Head, Yawn” is what I call your Mom’s boring oral.

Will C Thomas Howell’s replacement character where an Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Lost Skull hat rally style?

Josh Peck… really? Really?! How will he defeat the communists, by throwing banana cream pies at them?

Last time I was in Santa Monica I thought I was in the Red Dawn remake. So much Eurotrash running around stinking up the joint I took a Silkwood shower when I got home.

So, she is playing the “tough girl”.

…

Lady Gaga wasn’t available? Hell, Paris Hilton can kill a man at 100 yds with just VDs!

600 million screamin’ Chinamen think this is bullshit.

Man, it’s a good fucking thing the world hasn’t changed in the last 25 years, otherwise this might be kind of a stupid idea for a movie now.

OK, Let old Uncle Fekky tell you about tough girls (which this little cunt pictured AIN’T):

In Iowa, we fucking have tough girls. In fact, there was a girl in high school that could have potentially been His soul mate (if she hadn’t been so butch). This fucking bitch was like a sabretoothed-swine-minotaur and was one of the few people at City High that spent more time in the weight room then The Mighty One did (yes, I used to lift weights a lot and be a bad ass, now I am a wimpy nerd computer gamer Trekkie, fuck you).

However, Sabretooth wasn’t content with that. One day in Lit Class (I have no idea how it came up) a contest started class wide to see how long the students could hold their lit textbook out at arms length. Doesn’t sound so hard, but find yourself a big dictionary and try it!

Invariably, it came down to Sabretooth and Him. The Mighty Feklahr was 17 and full of hate for the world and pent up sexual rage. He was not going to let this anomaly of female humanity outlast Him in a test of strength!

However, Kahless decided that The Mighty One needed a lesson in emasculation.

I held out as long as I could. I didn’t quit, my arm did. I literally held out until my arm went numb from the elbow down and my hand involuntarily dropped the book. I couldn’t use that hand for like two days.

Fortunately, I got to redeem myself by bashing gays in the student newspaper. (True story!)

In conclusion, The Mighty Feklahr knows “tough high school girls”, and the ones He knows would sodomize fluffs like Adrianne with their clicks. Fuck that ho. She looks like Melissa Midwest.

This is just an analogy for the immigration debate.

When I see chics like this I always harken back to the words of Bruce Willis’s character private investigator Joe Hallenbeck in the Last Boyscout.

“Head or Butt?”

You guys should nominate that post. Lince loves long posts.

*slow clap for Fek*

I read it, Fek, and even sent it to a friend. I liked it. But yeah, too long for CoTW.

As long as the film takes place in 2010 with an invasion by the Soviet Union, I will be happy. Have high school kids ever heard of Russia?