06.02.09 9-YEAR-OLDS, DUDE.
A while back I reported that a self-help book written by a nine-year-old had been optioned by (who else) Fox. And now they’re going forward with it. They just hired a couple Hollywood Jews* to write the script.
Writers Ben Karlin and Stu Zicherman who paired to write the spec script “A.C.O.D. (Adult Children of Divorce),” will adapt “How to Talk to Girls,” a self-help book written by fourth-grader Alex Greven [pictured]. Karlin has been a writer and executive producer on Comedy Central’s “The Daily Show With Jon Stewart” and “The Colbert Report.” Zicherman was a co-writer/creator of ABC’s “Six Degrees,” and he co-wrote the feature “Elektra.”
Before HarperCollins published it in November, Greven was selling his handwritten pamphlet at his school book fair, offering his peers tips on communicating with their fairer schoolmates, beyond pulling hair and kicking shins. [yahoo]
A lot of people talk about the sensitive kids getting picked on in school, but it’s also important to note that they usually deserve it. Anyway, I know I and probably you got really angry about a nine-year-old writing a self-help book the first time I reported on this, but we should consider that his competition is Oprah and Dr. Phil. Dr. Phil is 300 pounds and writes diet books. No way either of those two tubbies reasons at higher than a fourth-grade level.
*I mean, I’m assuming. Can we just agree that it sounds best like this?
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/jamescameroncap-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/wedding_crashers_marmaduke-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/10/wolverine-deadpool-group-150x150.jpg)
There are 20 comments about:
9-YEAR-OLDS, DUDE.
Chapter 1: Batman Underoos aren’t nearly as cool as your Mom said they were
My one year old just wrote a self help book titled “Earn Your Keep, Kid - A Baby’s Guide To Helping With Household Debt”.
I beg to differ, JHC. They are super cool.
Eib, why the hell didn’t you go to Pershing Elementary School with me then? We could have had something special. :-(
Choosy moms choose
Jifghostwriting books for their precocious children then cashing in.I can’t wait for his high school follow-up, “Boners In the Gym Shower.”
Shia LaPoof really identifies with this kid…and knows how old he is!
I dunno, Vince, I knew a guy named “Stu Zicherman” and he was Dutch.
I’ll wait for the adaptation of his follow-up, Holy Shit Dudes, Like Did You Guys Know More Than Pee-Pee Comes Out of This Thing?!?
Followed no doubt by a third volume, How to Turn Book Jackets into Blow Jobs.
Alex Grevin’s self-help expertise is in the areas of “Hiding doody squirts” and “Cupping mosquito bites.”
I’m with Burnsy. I’ll bet my entire collection of Voltron toys that he grows up gay.
Want Hollywood gold? Get li’l Alex here set up with the twins from Prussian Blue.
(You remember them, don’t you?)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prussian_Blue_(American_duo)
I ask girls if I can have their cookie all the time, but that “cookie” doesn’t come on a lunch tray.
Burnsy and Donk are right….what 9 year old uses that much hair product?
Volume Two: Don’t Trust Girls, Especially Becky - She’s A Lying Whore
On a side note, any book that can get me over my crippling fear of talking to fourth grade girls sounds good to me.
I can’t wait until the fame goes to his head and he comes out with “How to Talk Down to Girls.”
Pauly, there is hair all over your name. It’s because you wont stop touching yourself.
This kid’s dad has a lifetime prescription for Homocil.
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