05.21.09 UWE BOLL TALKS DARFUR, BILLY ZANE
When I first heard the news that Uwe Boll was directing a movie (Janjaweed) about the Darfur genocide starring Billy Zane (a guy Boll had previously sued), I thought it was a joke. But then I realized, wait, jokes aren’t that obscure. Anyway, Movieset caught up with Uwe (OOOH-vay) at Cannes, where he confirmed that the project is real, and showed why he’s almost always mentioned in the discussion of greatest living directors. From this video...
“Za first risk ees zat za voman, who vas raped and haff AIDs now, zey are now actors ant zey have to recreate zat. Za secont risk ees za American actors who play all za journalists going to Sudan. I didn’t wrote dialog for zees guys, I basically only create characters oont za situations… On za first day of shooting, I realize some of za actors vere not used to it and zey had problems viss improvisation.”
Ahem. He’s directing a movie about the Darfur genocide starring Billy Zane, and he thought it’d be a good idea for the actors to come up with their own dialog. The only way this could be better is if Haley Joel Osment and Chuck Norris had cameos where they recreate the “Walker told me I have AIDS” scene.
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/12/uwe-boll-verne-troyer-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/04/janjaweed-boll-zane-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/02/loveguru-timber-150x150.jpg)
There are 15 comments about:
UWE BOLL TALKS DARFUR, BILLY ZANE
Uwe told me I “haff AITZ”.
Is Uwe related to Sexman?
I want to see a broken English contest between Uwe and the Stath.
zey had problems viss improvisation
Perhaps YooWEEE could hire the writers from Who’s Line Is It Anyway to help out. Oh wait, that show was completely done off the cuff. I forgot.
If anyone knows anything about rape victims it’d be Uwe. Hell he caused thousands of people to get into the shower and huddle in the fetal position with Postal alone…
“I basically only create characters oont za situations”
Uwe Boll admits that he is responsible for the modern day holocaust sounds about right
The Stath’s English is broken because it acted up.
If Uwe Boll were a Godzilla villian, he’d be Uwethra.
Vlance, may I suggest a new FilmDrunk animal?
Boll Ox, the excrement auteur.
I was in Cannes two years ago. If I knew all it took to get interviewed was a non-American accent and the ability to make incredulous statements about things I’m clearly not qualified to speak of, I’d have made the front pages.
For this post call me “Päülÿ Ðäηğęřöůşľγ”
1. Za Voman haff AIDS.
2. Zees guys haff problems viss improvisation.
DARFUR … Vee vill cast za chimpanzees instead.
In fact, Uwe Boll makes all of his directorial decisions based on faulty syllogisms. For instance:
1. Za Nazis veren’t so bad.
2. My friend haff za helikopfter oont zum horses.
ZEREFORE … Vee vill set BloodRayne in castle times.
1. Burt Venolds is not doing anyting.
2. I em making a film.
ZEREFORE … Burt Venolds vould make a fine king.
Have I mentioned the fact I was pissed off when I found out the ass wouldn’t let women in the ring with him when he did the whole “Fight Uwe Boll” thing? Cause I have no qualms about walking up to him and just kicking him in the nuts. I would have been crowned Queen of the Internets if I had had the chance. (sigh) What might have been.
Comment on this post:
You must be logged in to post a comment. Not yet a member, register for free.