05.12.09 DISNEY’S CINDERELLA ELLA ELLA ELLA EH EH…
Disney’s old-school 2D animated film The Princess and the Frog recently released a trailer and a poster. It’s a new twist on an old tale - this time, the heroine is a black girl from Jazz-Age New Orleans named “Princess Tiana.” She used to be named “Maddy,” but people thought that was too low-class, too slave-sounding, and too close to “Mammy,” so they changed it to Tiana, and now she sounds like an Asian pornstar.
In this version, when Tiana kisses the frog, instead of him turning into a prince, she turns into a frog. Which I suppose is more true to life. Relationships do tend towards the lowest common denominator. In fact, this is a lot like the version I wrote. “Hey, Princess, I’m gonna put my evil in you,” croaked the frog. “Psst. I hear you’re into Wart Showers.”
[poster via Cinematical]
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/lost-chick-lipbite-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/bitchslap-3-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/wolfman-international-poste-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/jeffbridges-crazyheart-blak-150x150.jpg)
There are 29 comments about:
DISNEY’S CINDERELLA ELLA ELLA ELLA EH EH…
New Orleans was so cute at Jazz-Age. Where did it all go wrong?
She used to be named “Maddy,” but people thought that was too low-class, too slave-sounding, and too close to “Mammy,”
Jesus, are we that racially sensitive? It’s not like they wanted to name her Kunta Kinte or something.
Kiss yo’ frog for a dolla’.
Hey baby, you don’t sound right. You got a frog in your throat?
Want one?
It’s hard to tell from the description - who’s the hereaux?
I liked this better when it was called Shrek.
I bet the people of Houston wish that frog had been around a couple of generations later.
You feelin’ froggy, just leap. More than just a vague threat now.
Damita! I thought you were gonna play with MY frog?
Chicken tetrazzini!
Who’s your crawdaddy?
When I ask a girl if she wants to “kiss a frog” I spray my tadpoles in her face.
They were going to name her Taniqu’shana but decided that’s a fucking stupid name.
I hope that alligator has a cajun accent.
I dunno, that poster just gives me a “Proud Mary”/Ike Turner vibe.
This is going to do terrible box office, the people of New Orleans aren’t going to fall for that “Let me show you a great new trailer” bit twice.
Is the frog going to be voiced by Xzribbit?
Oh Pauly. You’re such a Class Act.
In this version, when Tiana kisses the frog, instead of him turning into a prince, he turns into a symbol.
The frog will be voiced by Gerard Depardieux?
Fuck you if you think I’m going to look up that French douche’s name for spelling.
SPOILER ALERT: Princess Tiana dies in a high speed public bus accident.
Even in Jazz-Age New Orleans, it’s hard for a woman to find a good black man.
New Orleans was so cute at Jazz-Age. Where did it all go wrong?
1964. Go ahead, look it up.
Disney’s Cinderella ella ella ella eh eh
Dialect Gulla ulla ulla ulla meh oui.
I predict a hoppy ending.
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