Hannah Montana was expected to take third behind 4 Fast 4 Furious and Monsters Vs. Aliens this weekend but instead pulled off the upset. Between that and the Twilight juggertwat, get ready to hear the word “tween” more often than reality-show contestants say “thrown under the bus.”
Tween-friendly young adult novel “The Heartbreakers” is being turned into a movie called “Rules of Dating for Teenage Girls.” “Rules of Dating” centers on four friends and their on-again, off-again dalliances with boys. After several of the girls are dumped, they devise a set of rules they are sure will snag any man and prevent future breakups. Those familiar with the project described it as a coming-of-age comedy with a girl-power streak. [THR]
Yay, because 13-year-olds LOVE hooking up with random dudes! Rule 1: cigarettes are a great appetite suppressant. Rule 2: bad boys love you even if daddy doesn’t (especially if you dress slutty). And Rule 3: anal doesn’t count. Hooray, girl power! …Yeah, girl, lemme come of age all over your girl-power streak.




Rule #1: Don’t get caught.
Rule #2: Kick to the solar plexus.
That car seems legit.
I can dig it as long as I can’t get arrested for Twape and Twidnapping.
Women devising arbitrary and probably unfair rules about dating based on their own faulty assumptions?
I’m not sure audiences are going to buy that.
You’re not a sexual predator. You’re just a Youth Health and Sexual Services consultant.
After the movie, an usher will pass you a note:
Did U Like This? (check one)
____ YES
____ NO :(
Do these rules apply somewhat later in life? I’d like to snag anyman.
Assuming “snag” is a euphamism.
I thought only legless girls left power streaks?
*pours a little malt liquor out for my dawg John Ritter*
Nabokov already wrote the rules *I* follow. If it’s good enough for Humbert Humbert, it’s good enough for me.
Sunny Tzu and Mindy Machiavelli should only be approached when the sun is in their eyes.
“Rules of Dating Four Teenage Girls”? Make sure they all have the same name (preferably Ashley or Brittany) and that they never know mine.
Seriously, how much longer until that friggin Rock of Love ad is off from the bottom there? Is that a guy or a girl?
We always seem outnumbered, Fek, so don’t dare make a stand.
*puts down wood glue and pressboard*
You can huff pressboard?
The rules of dating teenage girls? Don’t you just count their purity rings?
The Sisterhood of the Traveling Prophylactics.
The only rule of any consequence to me was Rule 8: Black guys.