They say cutoff shorts are the new loin cloth
USA Today has your first look at the Native Americans cast as Stephenie Meyer’s “Wolf Pack” in New Moon, the sequel to Twilight.
Unlike cold-blooded neck biters, these poster guys for animal magnetism are hot. So hot that their temperature runs a steady 108 degrees, as anyone who has read Stephenie Meyer’s series of gothic romances knows. Four actors — Chaske Spencer, Alex Meraz, Kiowa Gordon and Bronson Pelletier, all with Native American heritage — join Taylor Lautner, 17, who returns as a hairier, scarier Jacob Black. The plotline finds Jacob growing closer to a distraught Bella (Kristen Stewart) after her vampire beau, Edward, runs off. [USA Today]
Great reporting, USA Today. Hey, am I taking crazy pills? Am I the only one who thinks it’s weird that an abstinence parable does such a poor job of disguising the author’s fantasy of getting f*cked by a hot-blooded wolf Indian? It’s just odd how okay everyone is with selling abstinence to tweens using the female equivalent of, “Hey, guys, check out the sweet tits on these pubescent virgins! Man, you can almost taste the steam comin’ off those camel toes. Really makes a guy wanna bed the same one for his entire life, knowhatI’msayin?”
On an unrelated note, I think the one on the right is called Dances with Radcliffe.