04.21.09 AMAZING: ‘TOMMY AND THE COOL MULE’
In TOMMY AND THE COOL MULE, Tommy’s DAD goes off to IRAQ, leaving TOMMY and his MOM to defend the FAMILY FARM from a GREEDY DEVELOPER played by KEVIN SORBO. But if he WANTS to be the MAN OF THE HOUSE, Tommy is going to have to WIN the BIG RACE…. (*RECORD SCRATCH*) on a mule! A cool mule, to be exact. Voiced by Ice-T.
I. Cannot. Believe. This. Is. A. Real. Movie. Seriously, this has to be from the same people who made Nachos the Cross-Eyed Cat, right? I would love to have been a fly on the wall when they were making the Cool Mule’s costume.
“Hmm, the bling necklace doesn’t fit over the mule’s head. I’m gonna have to go get a longer chain.”
“What? We’re burning daylight here! Screw it, just put the necklace over his face. There. I think it looks… cooler like that way, doesn’t it?”
“Whatever.”
[Source - thanks to Jake for the tip]
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/lost-chick-lipbite-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/bitchslap-3-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/wolfman-international-poste-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/11/jeffbridges-crazyheart-blak-150x150.jpg)
There are 55 comments about:
AMAZING: ‘TOMMY AND THE COOL MULE’
That looks like 40 acres of suck.
I just want to let everybody know that donkeys and mules are not the same thing.
Also, haha, Ice-T is voicing a sterile animal.
The last movie I saw about a cool mule was Maria Full of Grace. This probably won’t be as funny.
If he was really cool they’d call him Mule Brynner.
“They may take our farm, but they will never KICK. OUR. ASS!”
Neighers With Attitude?
Later, he gets shipped off to China where he runs away from home and pretends to be a horse to defend his people from Mongols.
Mule-an
Does this Mule sing “Crop Killer”?
So, the kid is riding a Mexican voiced by Ice-T with 20 condoms full of tar heroine up his ass… sounds pretty tits to me.
i always thought ice-t was an ass
Fuck, Max’s dick must be huge, I stepped on that fucker 5 minutes late.
Actually, I was looking up the info on IMdb, this is made by a dude named Andrew Stevens, you wanna laugh, and get an inkling of how bad this will be? Check out his ographies.
William S. Burro would be a good name for a mule that does a lot of heroin.
I dunno. I had to endure the Lord of the Rings trilogy. This doesn’t sound that bad.
*hangs self*
The mule is cool because he plows through so much ass.
“New Jack Ass City”
This mule is baller. Chewing on some oats and bangin’ fine jennies, dawg.
Ingrid Newkirk, president of PETa, just threw up a soy latte onto her soybean bacon wrapped tofu filet mignon.
They should have Carlos Mencia voice him and call him “Si, Biscuit.”
*punches self in the groin”
Then lezed out with Teri Hatcher.
This is why kids are retarded, this right here.
This is stupid, where’s that Mule’s Scarface poster?
That banner pic is from MTV’s Pimp my Manger episode where Cool Mule looses his shit because, “That ain’t Teak wood! What fucking bitch gonna suck a dick cuz my shit’s got Alder wood up in it?”
Yep, that Johan Franzen is P.I.M.P.
-o
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