04.08.09 A MICHAEL CRICHTON PIRATE BOOK?
This picture is related somehow, isn’t it?
When Michael Crichton died last year, I wasn’t mature enough to avoid the obvious ER joke. But more importantly, he left behind a book about pirates that was discovered in his files by an assistant.
HarperCollins plans to back “Pirate Latitudes,” ['Piratitudes' would've been way better -Ed.]which is set in Jamaica in 1665, with a first printing of 1 million copies. Story revolves around plans by a notorious pirate named Hunter and the governor of Jamaica and to raid a Spanish galleon filled with treasure. [...] the untitled book will be completed based on the writer’s notes. An author has not yet been hired to finish that work. [Variety]
Don’t judge me: I loved Crichton’s The Great Train Robbery, so a Crichton story about pirates actually sounds kind of awesome. *swallows excess saliva back down* Plus, there’s no way it could be worse than Pirates of the Caribbean 3. However, it’s not like the guy got hit by a truck one day, he was dying of cancer; if he’d wanted the book published it seems like he would’ve said something. Oh, Variety also adds that Crichton wrote the book “before his death.” That’s important to note. I always thought Hemingway jumped the shark right about the time he blew his brains out.
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There are 20 comments about:
A MICHAEL CRICHTON PIRATE BOOK?
A Spanish gallon of treasure? A jug of jenkem?
Since his death he’s only been writing the odd pamphlet. They sure are odd.
Is that Sid Haig in the middle pic? It made me shit the bed.
Big f’n deal. Beethoven continued to write symphonies after his deaff.
What’s that? Oh really? Fuck.
Taken in by Will Smiff grammar once again.
A pirate story that revolves around treasure and is set in the Caribean….this is fucking revolutionary.
If they make a movie of this, will it be rated “Arrrr”?
Will Arrrr Kelly do the theme song?
Will there be a product tie-in with Arrrrby’s?
Will Judge Reinhold get to use his old costume from “Fast Times at Ridgemont High”?
Will Disney sue the production company because “we own ALL rights to everything about Pirates”?
This explains why, when rigor mortis set in, there was a pirate flag tied to Crichton’s penis.
‘Tis better to have plundered the booty and lost than to have never plundered the booty at all.
P. Latitudes sails into theaters September 19, 2010.
The only treasure i’d be willing to plunder would be ladyboi booty.
The so-called “book” he left behind is nothing but a transcript of his rape trial, which just so happened to take place on International Talk Like A Pirate Day.
Mad Props to Juan for finding all the Arrrr jokes that I’m too god-damned fatigued to look for.
Freakin kids need to start sleeping at night.
Isn’t it safe to assume that any Pirate known by name is “Notorious”?
Pirate movie set in Jamaica?…Sounds a little Reggae to me.
You will all remember that this was the day that you almost watched Captain Jack Sparrow.
As a nod to the author’s conqueror, the film title of Crichton’s book ‘Pirate Latitudes’ will be “Tropic of Pancreatic Cancer”.
Fat pirates fly the Jolly Rancher.
$10 says the beads in the banner pic came from China.
They must have used some noxious chemical during manufacture that is causing that girl some serious swelling.
2 New ups? Who slipped Vink the shrooms?
When Gary Busey dies, his assistants will find an unfinished transcript of the Jurassic Park movie and the request to make it into a book.
Don’t hate on Variety. Look how much 2Pac has written since 96
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