03.09.09 MICKEY ROURKE BACK IN IRON MAN 2?
Stop pretending you’re immune to it, the man is adorable.
Mickey Rourke was offered a part as a villain in Iron Man 2 a while back, but the word on the internet is that Marvel initially low-balled him, and ever since, the line has been that “negotiations are ongoing” (maybe Clayface just doesn’t want to sign a 15-year contract like Sam Jackson). Over the weekend Rourke sparked more rumors with this exchange with photographers.
PHOTOGRAPHER: (unintelligible)
ROURKE: Iron Man 2.
PHOTOGRAPHER: Iron Man 2?
ROURKE: You bet your ass.
Sounds like negotiations are going well. But then again, there can be a wide gulf between “something is happening” and “Mickey Rourke thinks something is happening.” Also, “you bet your ass” is just one of the positive-sounding generic responses Mickey keeps on shuffle when dealing with random strangers. “You bet your ass. Sounds good, brother. Hey, nice to see ya. Thanks fer comin out. You bet your ass. Hey, sounds good brother…” He’s like a Magic 8 Ball you desperately want to be friends with. And it helps if you’ve brought magic 8 balls, if you know what I mean. GRR, FIREMAN PARTY!

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MICKEY ROURKE BACK IN IRON MAN 2?
Completely untainted thread, and I got nothing. A promising week begins.
Taint.
Actually Vince, I think this confirms Mickey will in fact, not appear in Iron Man 2, because I have it on good authority that this is his cagey little trick for maintaining his stock of asses.
Perhaps the photographer’s question was “Could you name one movie you will not be featured in?”
anything to keep his face from breaking their $1100 lens
I’ll bet you asses to ankles Mickey Rourke smells like a tannery.
Terrance Howard is also back in, according to the homeless man behind Spago, named Terrance Howard.
I listened to the tape and they were actually saying “Turtle Rape Shoe.”
Look, I’m kinda new here so I know people have got on Mickey already. But I missed my turn so I just want to get this off my chest and move forward. Sigh…Okay…
Mickey your face looks like a bed of coral
Mickey your face looks like its the stunt double for Edward James Almos face
Mickey Freddy Kruger saw your face and said “WHAT THE FUCK?”
Mickey your face looks like you dry it with a spike strip.
Mickey your face looks like Hannibal Lecter just used it to breake out of a maximum security prison.
Mickey your face looks like you went down on Paris Hilton without a dental dam
Mickey your face looks like its in mid-facemelt from the ark of the convenant.
Mickey your face looks like you’ve taken thousand upon thousands of radioactive cum shots from the Hulk
Mickey your face looks like Dennis Franz’s ass.
Pfwwew….I feel much better….oh and I really hope you’re in Iron Man 2 Mickey. I’m a big fan.
When asked to elaborate, Robert Downey Jr said “When you see it, you’ll shit bricks”.
You bet your ass or Mickey Rourke is going all-in.
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