No, it’s not just a clever headline. Kevin Smith is signed up to direct A Couple of Dicks for WB, with Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan attached to star. I’m sure people will make a big deal about this because Smith isn’t listed as a writer. Up until now, he’s only directed his own scripts for Miramax and Weinstein. Here’s the deal though: Zack and Miri suuuucked. I wanted to like it. I really did. Kevin Smith seems cool as hell and I love reading his Hollywood stories, but at some point he’s gotta give me something more than the literal premise from the title with one or two funny pop culture references thrown in.
That said, Tracy Morgan and Bruce Willis as buddy/detectives? Count me in. ONE OF THEM is a grizzled white veteran… THE OTHER is a fast-talking black rookie… put them together and the sparks are really gonna fly! Literally! (I think). So yeah, hold that football still, Kev, I’m gonna kick the shit out it this time.
[via ErcBoxOffice]
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I feel decieved, I was sure the movie was going to be “An Officer and Al Borland”.
What time does Jacktion! get up these days, anyway?
You mean Family Feud’s Richard Karn?!?!
Somebody’s gon’get pregnant.
So…Die Hard With A Vengenace meets?
Nevermind, it’s just Die Hard With A Vengeance redone by Kevin Smith.
The Mighty Feklahr tried to do the “Kevin Smith Movies” scene, too many hipster douchebags, though.
*gives Lince the “stink-eye” (assfuck)*
*chodin arrives to FilmDrunk band practice with his keytar*
Let’s make some fuck sounds, kids.
I wonder if smith is going to pull a silent bob on those two dicks when no one is looking.
Die Hard with an alleged rapist
morclad: I’m thinking more like Another 48 Hors D’ouevres.
I guess Bruce is trying to make a quick buck to help with that $4 million lawsuit, right? or Kevin Smith has better cocaine than Quentin Tarantino, one or the other.
I’m a little relieved Kevin Smith isn’t writing this one. I’m not so sure Tracy Morgan can read, let alone the big words Smith likes to throw in to make the audience feel dumb.
One does the duty, one gets the booty.
Yeah, “fuck” can get a bit confusing at times.
My favorite part of attending a Kevin Smith movie is the opportunity to change out of my Hot Topic clothes and talk to some other open minded kids about how “nobody gets it, except for us”.
Bruce Willis and Tracy Morgan??!?! I guess this is just another pairing added to the list of harebrained Hollywood duos like: Jackie Chan & Chris Tucker, Sam Jackson & Eugene Levy, Steve Zahn & Martin Lawrence, Tim Robbins & Martin Lawrence, Luke Wilson & Martin Lawrence, Raven Samone & Martin Lawrence, Paul Giamatti & Martin Lawrence, John Travolta William H. Macy Tim Allen AND Martin Lawrence.
Okay, that last one isn’t actually a harebrained duo. I like to call it a Harebrained Martin Lawrence seasoned Clusterfuck Sodomy Sandwich. Copywritten thank you.
Maybe they could make this genre interesting if it was a buddy-cop movie starring Louis Farrakan and David Duke
I would watch that.
The Last Boy Scout 2: Scout Master
*mid scene*
Smith: “Bruce…it’s like, um, it’s like your character is…he’s…shit, look I didn’t write this movie. To be honest, it’s a little hard for me to totally understand their motivations.”
Willis: “It’s cool dude, my ex wife is fucking that one guy from that MTV show.”
My porn name was Tracy M. Organ.
Another buddy cop movie? This makes those Hasbro berks look like art patrons.
Willis: “It’s cool dude, my ex wife is fucking that one guy from that MTV show.”
KS: “Aw shit, not Bill Bellamy? I just hired him to be Tracy’s stand-in…”
Miami V2ce: Now With Attempts At Comedy
I like movies with crazy black guys and serious white guys because it makes think that slavery was hilarious.
“In a world were the struggle between good and evil, light and darkie, is eternal, They must fight together for SUPREMACY”
Coming 2010
Oh, and Kevin Smith:
WE GET IT, YOU’RE FROM REDBANK! NOW TAKE THAT FUCKING SHIRT OFF! I SWEAR TO GOD THAT EVERYTIME I SEE YOU, YOU’RE WEARING THAT SAME FUCKING SHIRT! WE GET IT ALREADY!!!!
Spike Lee is upset that, due to casting decisions, the white dick is taller than the black dick.
What you can’t tell from that picture is that Jason Mewes is trying to inject that little girl into a vein between his toes.
So this is featuring Dick Tracy?
I hope they solve the case of the missing McNuggets.
Actually Crappy, it looks more like he’s trying to hide the train tracks on his underage girlfriend’s arm.
KEVIN SMITH DIRECTS COUPLE OF DICKS
Smith: RIGHT HERE, GUYS!
Perhaps they’ll do something crazy… like follow Tropic Thunder’s lead and put Willis in black face and Morgan in white face. It could be a hilarious romp through racial tensions!
Everyone needs to take they’re Clerks bias and stick it up there ass. Zach and Miri was fucking helarious. If you didn’t know that Kevin Smith directed it you would’ve laughed your ass off. And if you can’t laugh at ugly people fucking, then you sir are a fucking robot!!!
I thought it was funny at a couple spots – like I said, I generally find Kevin Smith a funny and interesting guy – but the movie was EXACTLY EVERYTHING I EXPECTED AND NOTHING MORE. I watched the previews and thought, “Hmm, a movie about two platonic friends who decide to make a porno and end up falling in love. I wonder what else happens.” NOTHING. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ELSE HAPPENS. And dude seriously needs to stop putting Clerks actors in all his movies. With the exception of Jason Mewes, they’re fucking terrible.
Oh, and given that I used to edit porn, it may be that I’m a little inured to the hilarity of ugly people fucking. Real ugly people fucking are lot uglier than anyone in Zack and Miri.
Long story short, I must respectfully disagree.
Just as an FYI – the guy in the middle was in Vice magazine’s Do’s and Don’ts looking at a porno on the subway.
No joke.