Look, George, there’s a kitty over there. Did you see the kitty, George? Wanna go pet the kitty later, George?
Even after three gnü movies, an animated movie, and countless other crap that I don’t care enough about to look up, George Lucas is still milking Star Wars‘ old, curdled teat. Latest project? A live-action Star Wars TV series.
“According to Lucas, the show will focus on minor characters from the saga and be set in the time period between “Revenge of the Sith” (Episode III) and the original “Star Wars” (Episode IV). The action will follow the Rebel Alliance as it slowly gains strength against the Empire. There will be Stormtroopers, but no Jedi or Darth Vader will appear on screen. As he did with the “Clone Wars” series, Lucas will write and shoot an entire year’s worth of episodes before looking for a cable channel on which to air the series.” [MTV]
After retarded Jamaican alien Jar-Jar Binks and his gay Jabba the Hutt based on Truman Capote characters, who knows what delicious surprises Lucas has in store for us this time! Ooh, I know! How ’bout Han Solo has a Puerto Rican niece, based on Rosie Perez? Mira, Chuy, ju deeden’t feex the pinche hyperdrive right, stupeed. Lujana Soto, we could call her.
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Dear God,
Please cause George Lucas to suffocate under the weight of his own neck fat.
KTHXI
That’s what the kids want..
insert B above.
Random factoid: “Sarlacc” is Tatooinian for “I have serious mommy issues.”
Do you want to know what would be REALLY ridiculous? Geroge Lucsa could go back and edit Ep. IV to make it look like Greedo shoots at Han, and Han kills him in self defense! Man, that would be GAAAAAA-AY! BONG!!!!!!!!
GRRRR….ALDERAAN SHOT FIRST!!!
Alderaan was full of total douchebags.
And by “niece” you mean super flamboyant nephew in short shorts riiight??
Banner pic: the Geriatric Three Stooges, Larry, Curley and Moe.
Live action? Pfftt. This series cries out for Claymation. Or possibly Lego-mation.
George is also developing a Star Wars-based reality show for MTV called From G’s to Gungans.
George must have a diet that consists of a cup of gravel a day to get his teeth to look that f-ed up.
Everyone on Alderaan aimed farts at that “moon” before they were exterminated.
Not so effective but charming none the less.
I’d like to see a “Perfect Strangers” set inside a Tauntaun.
George also added to the fact that No Jedi & No Vadar would be in this series ever by stating the removal and any laser canons, spaceships, aliens and all the other reasons ANYONE LIKES HIS SHIT.
I think this will be the Battle Star Galactica of erectile dysfunctions caught on tape.
“There will be Stormtroopers” Tom Cruise calls Lucas to see if he needs an actor to play a one-eyed Stormtrooper officer who is plotting to kill Darth Vader.
What the news never reveals is that Lucas has gone the way of Michael Jackson – bankrupt due to a candy and child porn addictions. That’s is why we keep getting these solid pieces of crap.
Does live-action mean that actors will actually appear to be alive? A bold move away from the movies.
Woah woah woah, I heard Lucas was only writing one episode which gave me at least a tiny glimmer of hope. The fact that he’s writing a whole season… shit. At least he can pretty much only redeem himself at this point.
BANNER PIC:
Steven: George…I um…think I see my wife over there. I’ll catch up with you later.
George: I don’t see her?
Steven: Err…Yeah she’s right behind that light post. I better go.
Harrison: S-So’s my wife. Gotta go too.
George: Maybe I can come and say hi
Steven & Harrison: NO!!
Steven: We’ll just see you later man.
Lujana Soto tried to sell me a fake gold chain at the supermarket.
Come on, VaLince, everyone knows giving a kitty to George Lucas is more dangerous than leaving an infant with Nick Nolte. I like to think Speilberg and Ford are at least a little smarter than that.
ABC has ordered 13 episodes of My Two Droids.
Lujana Soto cut Greedo realllllllll good and slow first
Stop me if I’m overstepping the bounds of sense and reason here, but didn’t they already make a live action TV show based on Star Wars?
I believe it was called Battlestar Galactica.
Or maybe Babylon 5.
Or Space: Above and Beyond.
Or Battlestar Galactica (version 2.0)
Or Red Dwarf.
Anyone? Red Dwarf? Anyone?
I’d watch a show dedicated to explaining what the fuck Uncle Owen was “farming” in the middle of a fucking desert.
[seriouspost]He should have done his Sequel-Trilogy instead of all this redundant Animation and TV crap. [/seriouspost]
I could’ve beared watching three movies, but I cannot bear him. I tried, but bears are expensive to train and the first one got eaten in the line of duty.
George Lucas knows what the kids want
To be let out of his basement?
STOP!!! THEY’RE RAPING HIM!!!!! STOOOOOOOOOP!!!!!
I’d be down with a Boba Fett tv show. Assuming it was done by someone with brains and talent. And also wasn’t a television show. In fact, George could just pay me 100 million dollars and I’ll make a Boba Fett movie. It couldn’t do any worse than Clone Wars. :-)