I’m about as sick of hearing about Watchmen as a person could be, but I have to admit blue condoms is kind of clever.
A source told WatchmenComicMovie.com that he and his friends were “handed a few of these Watchmen condoms in Columbus, Ohio over Valentine’s Day weekend.”
The condoms come in a package that resembles a matchbook with the iconic blood-stained smiley badge on the front, and the film’s name and release date on the back.
When opened, the neon blue colored condom is presented in a clear plastic wrapper with the tagline, “We’re society’s only protection.”
I guess that’s better than my idea for Billy Crudup dildoes. Subtler, I suppose. I tried to ask him if I could get a plaster mold, but he just kept acting all touchy about me being in his stall. Well la di da your highness.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/257/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/Neighborhood-Watch-movie-poster-550x814-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/03/EatPrayLove-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/03/MUSSOLINI-PARTYDOG-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/07/public-enemies-depp-150x150.jpg)
I’d smurf Billy Crudup.
This headline becomes infinitely more interesting if read “WATCH MEN PUT YOUR DICK IN IT”.
After using said condom, all the ladies will be sporting a bloody smiley face as well :D
BUT HOW DO THEY TASTE!?!?!?!
Crapbasket, I WAS going to say they taste like blueberry, but with a small aftertaste of radiation.
I had a green colored cheese pole spoo catcher that was gonnerhea flavo(u)red.
10% of all sperm collected through the usage of such condoms must be sent to FOX Studios.
I’d never wear that thing. Say what you want to about being responsible and shit. Condoms feel weird.
*pulls boxer shorts into asscrack*
Condoms are OK, but the most effective form of birth control is being a huge comic book dork.
P.S. My cock calls itself The Comedian. Tip your waitress!
I was tricked into taking one of these the other day. This hot girl walked up and said “How’d you like to have your dick blue?”
Who the hell uses condoms anymore?
“Watch, man. You put your dick in it.” is what my Dad said when he taught me about the Hot Pocket fifi.
Do they make you cum in slow motion?
Now my dick can match my balls.
This’ll go well with the Rorshach mask I make girls wear.
A neon blue Watchmen water balloon?! Neeto!!
AIDs? Herpes? Syphilis? Fucking amateurs. How about giving a bitch radiation sickness? Thats hardcore.
They are also selling the Silk Spectre I date rape kit. Pick it up from your local grocer
Bout time they went after a different demographic.
The typical Watchmen fan will really appreciate this giveaway. One less sock to throw away before mom collects the dirty laundry.
Come on Zach…people who watch this movie don’t have sex. Please.
That condom kicking it in that see-thru outfit is making me all hot.
*chodin goes to cartwheel into thread, plants hands straight into dog shit*
FUCK MIKE!!!!!
These condoms had better postpone my fucking release date.
If I wanted a blue dick, I’d slap a yellow condom on my green dick.
*wink and finger gun*
Mine condom is the IMAX version
Mine condoms are what Hitler wore.
Great thing about irradiated condoms, once the sickness sets in, no shaving!
Another great thing about irradiated condoms: If it breaks, the bitch will be left with a child that has flippers. Always looking for more motivation for abortions.
LeRon Leroy Jerome: “Yo Maury, I know that I ain’t the daddy, ’cause I was rocking some blue, kryptonite shit on my dick. Ya’ll heard!?”
If I wanted a blue dick I’d tighten the zip-tie at the base of it.
“Mine condoms are what Hitler wore.”
Columbine condoms prevent indiscriminate shooting.
This will only encourage Blue Watchman Group sex.
Only problem is that before you can wear this condom, your dick has to ripped to atoms by an Intrinsic Field Subtractor.
An Intrinsic Field Subtractor or Paris Hilton’s pussy. Whatever’s easier to get to first. So…Paris Hilton’s pussy.
Buy my book, “As soon as I heard the phrase ‘Intrinsic Field Subtractor’ I had to have his cock in my mouth,” and Other Things the Ladies Never Say.
Mime condoms are what you wear for fellatio.
Get it? Because she can’t talk with your cock in her mouth! ….oh hey look New Up!
…screw you guys…
The Blue Man Group can’t talk either. Not to be confused with the Blew Man Group, although the confusion is understandable for the reason you provide.
Five bucks says its got low level radiation all over it that will make you sterile. No one knows that Dr. Manhattan shoots blanks.
I once told a girl that I wanted to dock my Owl Ship into her. We have not talked since.
Sometimes while I’m having sex, I like to work in some Watchmen role play. Like, I pretend to become a giant inter dimensional squid and then she pretends to be the city of New York. And then i just tear that shit up.