“I’ve waited 3,000 years just to stare at your f-cking forehead.”
I know Hollywood’s really no different than any other business in that they spend about 1% of their time actually coming up with new ideas and the other 99% sniffing each other’s butts, but still. You’d think that just once, someone, somewhere, at some point during last five years, if only to buck the trend, would name their sequel a simple (blank) 2. But no. The focus groups have decreed it! Sequels mustn’t have numbers!
MTV News has the scoop on the official name and logo for Chris Weitz’s soon-to-film sequel to “Twilight.” Dubbed “The Twilight Saga’s New Moon.” [MTV]
So yeah, it’s basically your same-old vampire story, but pumped fill of fainting and melodrama and hyperbole and mormonism, so you can’t really argue that calling it a “saga” doesn’t fit. Though I’ll tell ya what I’d like to pump it full of. That’s right, lead. *blows smoke off gun finger*




It’s the curse of the electric boogaloo.
Moronism is what got us into this mess in the first place.
In fairness, when you make movies based on books, you’re supposed to name the movies after the books. Lord of The Rings 2 wouldn’t have worked very well.
In unfairness, I just stole your son’s backpack.
I bucked a trend once. Her name was Sister Gloria.
New Moon barely beat out Fatty Fatty 2 By 4.
PIC CAPTION: Is that the Eagles you’re listening to. I hate the fucking Eagles man.
I was sooooo hoping it would be Twilight 2: Revenge of the Fallen. Thank God for Michael Bay.
Will there be velocoraptors?
If they really listened to the focus groups, Twilight 2 would be called “OMG LOL! HE is SOOO HOT! LETS EAT CHOCOLATE AND TALK ABOUT MEN IN A WAY THAT IS BOTH UNREALISTIC AND SAD! “
Well, I’m glad to see they’re being realistic when it comes to the appearance of these lesbian vampires.
PIC CAPTION: You got a huge zit right on the bridge of your nose.
I’m amazed the producers were able to hear any actual focus group feedback over the sound of chewing and wheezing.
I guess “Fuckin’ Dark” made too much sense to follow Twilight?
PIC CAPTION: Does Edward Cullen have to smack a bitch?!?
“Bella, when I look into your eyes, I see, well, um, the fluorescent light fixture over my head…”
Banner Pic: Coppertone’s most successful “After” campaign ever.
Banner pic: “DID YOU SMOKE ALL MY WEED?”
When MTV says “they got a scoop”, does anyone else but me find themselves on the verge of tears and go “Awwww”
Banner Pic: “Like my felt coat? There’s a lot of womb to move around in it.”
I intend to annoy you all with bad Ledger puns all day.
This will be my Ledgerdomain.
“Do you want to know how I got these (O)scars?”
“I OD’ed.”
Seriously, though, Twilight 2 Should be called “Twolight”
Banner Pic: Edward, dude, your unibrow is fucking ridiculous.
Banner Pic: “Are you listening to the fucking Interview with the Vampire audio book? You cheating whore!”
Sorry Lester,
I can’t ledger do that.
This is a Twilight thread after all … show some respect for the deceased!
Banner pic: I’ve lived for over 3,000 years to finally fall in love with the most marginally attractive girl I could find.
Hopefully Chris Weitz’s “Midas touch” will do for the ‘Twilight’ snoozefest the same as it did for the ‘His Dark Materials’ saga.
Stick to “dicks-in-pies”, bro.
When hipster book series like this take off, it makes me pause and thank my 3rd grade teacher for teaching me the ways of love rather than how to read.
Twilight 2:Twilightier
Pattinson better watch that purty face of his. Kristen Stewart is so high on muthafuckin chronic she is going to confuse his nose for a Dilly Bar and fucking bite into it. TO HER, IT’S FUCKING HILARIOUS!
When book series like this get big, it makes me stop and thank my 2nd grade teacher for learning me the ways to love instead of how to read.
You are aware that the book that the second Twilight movie is based on is called New Moon, right? I agree that the “The Twilight Saga’s …” part is superfluous, but its not like they made up a stupid subtitle for the movie ala ‘Revenge of the Fallen’. The Harry Potter movies weren’t called Harry Potter, Harry Potter 2, Harry Potter 3, etc. because the books had names, the same with Lord of the Rings (as someone pointed out already), and the same with Twilight. What did you expect them to do?
Call it New Moon. Call it Twilight 2. Call it Twilight 2: New Moon. Call it Twilight: New Moon. All of the above would’ve been better than “The Twilight Saga’s New Moon”, which is probably why they aren’t calling it that anymore.