After the jump, you can see the bootleg version of the new Transformers 2 (*sigh* Revenge of the Fallen) trailer. I know it’s cute to say that Michael Bay movies are just a bunch of explosions cut together, but really, the first 1:20 of this trailer really is just explosions cut together. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. In other news, the Transformers message board reports that Devastator will be FOUR TIMES BIGGER than the robots in the first movie. “Expect Devastator to be 100 to 120 feet tall in the movie,” they say.
Thereby making it THE BIGGEST FICTIONAL CGI ROBOT IN HISTORY! TURN YOUR SPEAKERS UP TO 11, FAGGOT!
*punches a girl, air guitar*
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Is that a Thomas Kinkade painting?
Devastator will also be sponsored by Enzyte.
Revenge of the Fallen? So then . . . what? The old lady from the Life Alert commercials is back for vengeance?
1 minute and 20 seconds of explosions cut together? Sounds like my house on Mexican food night.
Except change “1 minute and 20 seconds” to “4 hours, 15 minutes, and 20 seconds.”
Thank god, I had a condom on when I watched this. *sigh*
There is no sexier sound on this planet than Megan Fox screaming no.
I once got kicked out of the cabaret for being too ‘awesome’.
Robot fucking? No. Fucking robots.
Whoa whoa whoa…did someone just punch me?
More like Buttcam 2 Electric Poopaloo
Burnsy, what about when she mumbles it? B/c the roofies just kicked in?
Somehow that put “Who’s Johnny, she said, smiled and looked the other way” in my head. And for that, someone should die.
It’s not the size of the robot in the fight it’s the size of the fight in the robot.
…ok, yeah. It’s the size of the robot in the fight.
Fact. El DeBarge will play my first and third weddings. Fact.
Michael Bay: “I want that robot to be bigger.”
CGI Artist: (presses a button, scales robot up) “How’s that?”
Michael bay: “Bigger!”
Artist: (presses button again) “Good?”
Bay: “BIGGER!”
Artist: (presses button TWICE) “How ’bout now?”
Bay: “YES! Awesome.”
Optimus Prime has an “o-ring” face when he robo-gasms to Megan Fox.
I like to picture Michael Bay’s creative session with the CGI artists to be a lot like the boob size scene in Weird Science.
I want to give everyone in this film the finger. Except Shia LeBouf, because he would try to take it.
Bruns-Oddly enough, Michael Bay’s sex life is a lot like the shower scene from Weird Science!
“Based on Hasbro’s Action Figures?” Well, why don’t they just go crazy and make a “Stretch Armstrong” movie while they’re at it?
Oh, right. Never mind.
“Biggest fictional robot in history?” Pffft…Gigantor begs to differ.
Further, Bay’s filmography strongly resembles Chet’s final scenes in weird science…
Finally, we all want Megan Fox as our PE teacher, just like in Weird Science.
Does that mean that Lepoof is running around wearing a half-shirt and Megan Fox’s panties?
Get real Fek. Megan Fox is no Kelly Lebrock.
Unfortunately Kelly Lebrock is now 2 1/2 Kelly Lebrocks, so there you go.
It’s true Fek, as my PE wanted to do bad things to me too!
(wait, um….)
Michael Bay gives his hair that wind-swept look by blowing up an armored tank and staring into the blast.
N’up, sans giant fucking robots.
The beginning of this shitbomb is nearly identical to the trailer for Armageddon and Pearl Harbor. He’s copying himself now? Reminds me of when i whack off in the mirror.
mmm…good. needs more giant fictional robot, though. and maybe just a dash more iconic building explosion.
Transformers are trying to take over the world!!! As if the Jews weren’t bad enough.