See? I told you The Wrestler was realistic. The guy who played a steroid dealer in the movie was arrested yesterday in a steroid bust that “ended in a violent chase.” Just like my dates.
Federal prosecutors in Manhattan accused Scott Siegel of leading Drug Enforcement Administration agents and local police on a car chase worthy of an action flick.
Was it like the new Bond? Maybe the cops’ vision kept cutting to a shaky closeup of the guy’s shoe.
Prosecutors said investigators had seized 1,500 bottles labeled as anabolic steroids and tens of thousands of dollars in cash during searches of Siegal’s home and that of his parents.
Authorities had Siegel under surveillance as part of a steroid-trafficking investigation. On Wednesday night, officers staking out his parent’s town house in a gated development in Westchester County spotted him getting out of his car carrying a brown box, court papers said.
Siegel spotted the officers unmarked vehicle, walked over and commented on their car before driving away, the papers said. When he returned a short time later, several police vehicles converged on his car. In the ensuing pursuit, he smashed through a fence and rammed three police cars and two DEA cars, “apparently intentionally,” the court papers said.
When cornered, Siegel again smashed into police cars and aimed his car at one of the officers who was on foot “in an apparent attempt to run him over,” the paper said. He eventually tried to flee on foot before officers finally grabbed him, the papers added. [AP]
It’s strange, steroid users are usually characterized by their level-headedness. I’ve got video of Siegel being led away in cuffs after the jump, and in case you were wondering whether he’s wearing an Ed Hardy shirt… of course he’s wearing an Ed Hardy shirt. Take that, Affliction.
[picture and video source = Worstpreviews]


I love that they had to use two sets of handcuffs because he can’t put his arms down all the way.
Everyone knows that a big bucket of steroids comes free when you open an Ed Hardy edition MasterCard.
n the ensuing pursuit, he smashed through a fence and rammed three police cars and two DEA cars.
The chase reportedly continued once Seigel finally finished running to his car and sped away.
THIS STORY MAKES ME SO FUCKING ANGRY!!!
Ram Jam!
Have you ever seen a steroid junky,
with balls the size of bees?
If you’ve ever seen that steroid junky,
then you’ve seen me.
SIEGEL SMAAAAASH!!!
Prosecutors said investigators had seized 1,500 bottles labeled as anabolic steroids
which were stored in a well-lit, glass room with a giant neon sign that read “HERE ARE THE STEROIDS” that was powered by an extension cord leading out to a 3 ton generator parked in the front yard below the 30′ billboard that read “GOT JUICE? WINK WINK (I SELL STEROIDS)”.
If I do ‘roids, my cock better be rocking a 6-pack by May
blatant DEA ostracism, any gearbox knows that 1500 bottles is clearly for personal use….apparently Siegel was so traumatized on the set of the wrestler by Micky Rourke’s face he’s been ingesting the HGH to overcome the mental injuries.
In unrelated news, Seigel’s neighbor Mort Goldfarb has been unable to sit for three weeks due to his ‘roid problem.
Of course, he just HAD to try the old Jedi mind trick first, waving his hand and saying, “These are not the ‘roids you’re looking for”.
The chase ended violently as police finally shot Siegel as he was ripping the face off his mother’s friend.
On the bright side, his boyfriend in prison will be able to play connect the dots on his bacne while he’s getting cornholed.
OOOOOH! It looks like a unicorn!
At what point does a drug dealer finally become successful enough to move out of his parents house?
Can’t you get arrested for just wearing an Ed Hardy shirt?
“…converged on his car…”
This dude wasn’t driving a jacked F-150 with a Metal Mulisha banner sticker in the back window and sporting some Truck Nutz?
I call bullshit.
Mom’s gonna be even madder when she finds out he crashed her car.
No auyPl, but you do have to roll your elbows out when you walk and call dudes “brah” alot.
Clean and jerk is going to take on a whole new meaning for this guy.
In a related story, the police chased Steven Siegal straight to DVD.
I’m not ashamed to admit it, I’d chase the shit out of Katy Segal.
Chasing Jonathan Livingston Seagull made me feel like a pussy.
They’re going to send him to jail, where ain’t nothing to do but lift weights. *wipes away single tear* Poor bastard.
yeah, like eat some more ice cream while your at it tubby fat cat bastard. i like mine served open flamed.
Can hear the commercial now: Here’s to you, Mr. Steroid Raging Road Rager.
*chodin scoots ice cream cart into thread, opens top and begins to pass merchandise to all his favorite homos*
Cum and get em’ while they’re hot!!! We’ve got dick shrinkers, ball destroyers, voice fucker-uppers, hair growers, Adam’s apple demolishers, cunt shrinkers aaaannnndddd push-pops!
“Bro, killer traps!!! You totally ate more pills than I did!”
Say what you will, Scott Siegel is the most amazing method actor ever. So suck a fuck.
In an official statement, DEA agents stated: “The world is a crude place. We can’t afford to let overly ripped people walk the streets. I mean, would you really want your meth dealing son working out next to this guy?”
Lanky Mangina, as soon as you are done gheying us out with this post, The Mighty Feklahr would like to share a riddle:
Who is the Klingon impersonating accountant that got drunk at lunch and is going to take it out on you guys, AND has two middle fingers?
…
QOVLPATH!!!
If they had ‘roids for the anus, I’d take them to snap Burnsy’s dick off.
Yo Chod! Got any buttcherry flavo(u)red Push-Poops left?
*reaches into cart, pulls out GIANT red rubber fist*
You mean, one of these?
FACT: there is a direct correlation between Ed Hardy shirts and male pattern baldness.
Me thinks VaLince is less having a Free for All Friday as much as an I’m High as Fuck and Don’t Give a Shitpile Friday.
Success!!
I called my bitch Dianabol one time. She started humping my leg and when I stopped her she screamed and snapped my arm in three places.
The sphincter is a muscle, Pauly. It stands to reason that if you were to shoot steroids into it, you’d be a fag.
In a related story A-Rod is gay. OK, not so related.
Sure.as.fuck.do Broham!
{Throws a fiver at Chod and runs off into the bushes}
At least he was arrested by Commissioner Gordon.
Do 70s mustaches come with the DEA jacket?
HEEEY! This Push-Pop tastes like a Dick Shrinker!
“Hey! You got DickShrinker in my Push-PooP!”
“Well you got Push-Poop in my DickShrinker!”
Fags.
Look kids, as long as all of my items are “pre-used”, they’re gonna’ melt all over each other when the sun is up, like this.
Hey, don’t push me.
Push in my shit.
I did ‘roids then jumped on a stair-climber and had ‘roid rage against the machine.
I usually get pretty fired up when I play the arcade version of As’roids.
Siegel, huh? Sounds like a nice jewish boy. A proud Muscle-Headowitz.