Adventureland is director Greg Mottola’s follow-up to Superbad, starring the hilariously be-Jewfro’d Jesse Eisenberg and that chick from Twilight who’s apparently some kind of moron.  I actually don’t need to tell you most of this, because if you watch the red-band trailer below, you’ll see it in title sequence.  It’s nice how they put this together – they made it more a mashup of footage that doesn’t really giveaway the plot or the jokes, just text and brief snippets that sell the movie.  It’s kind of a coming-of-age, teen sex comedy set in a theme park, based on Mottola’s own experience.  Ha, “coming of age,” I just got that.   And then I came.
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Well I suppose this was inevitable.  There’s a plan afoot to remake Paul Verhoeven’s 1990 classic Total Recall.

Neal H. Moritz and his Original Films banner are in final negotiations to develop and produce [the remake].  Calling Dick’s story “prescient,” Moritz said he hoped the advancements in technology and state-of-the-art visual effects can help tell the “Recall” story in a fresh way. [THR]

Awesome, cast John Cena, throw in a shitload of CGI, what could go wrong? Moritz, by the way, most recently produced Evan Almighty, I Am Legend, Prom Night, Made of Honor, and Fast & Fourious.  I Am Legend, by the way, was the film that declined to use the relatively easy and inexpensive method of shooting mutants, i.e., actors in makeup, and instead opted to make a bunch of CGI things that all sorta looked the same.  But I’m sure this will be awesome.  Remakes where most of the audience still remember the original always turn out great.  I mean, look at… uh, that one movie. Came out last year?  Had that one guy in it? You probably didn’t hear about it.  It was big overseas.

This picture of Jesus Christ riding Falcor the Luckdragon comes courtesy of FilmDrunkard RoboPanda.  I’m not sure where he found it or who made it.  And no, Jesus is not wearing a sombrero.  That’s clearly a jalo.  Er, halo.

UPDATE: Says reader Kyle, “Its a piece called “Happy Flight” by Joseph Griffith – http://peachstapler.cgsociety.org/gallery/409203/

Not only does Clint Eastwood think you belong to a generation of pussies and gooks, he thinks you fairies should cut it out with the politically correct bullshit already.

He says the world would be a better place if we could still laugh at inoffensive jokes about different races. The actor and director, 78, said we live in constant fear of being labelled racist for simply laughing about national stereotypes.  ‘People have lost their sense of humour,’ he told Germany’s Der Spiegel magazine.

‘In former times we constantly made jokes about different races.  You can only tell them today with one hand over your mouth otherwise you will be insulted as a racist. I find that ridiculous. In those earlier days every friendly clique had a “Sam the Jew” or “José the Mexican” – but we didn’t think anything of it or have a racist thought.’

‘It was normal that we made jokes based on our nationality or ethnicity. That was never a problem. I don’t want to be politically correct. We’re all spending too much time and energy trying to be politically correct about everything.’ [DailyMail]

I know I’m supposed to say something cute and make fun of Clint for being old right now, but I agree with him 1000%.  These hippie fascists at some point decided that recognizing obvious differences or using non-vague words not invented in the last 15 years is the same as hate or discrimination.  Ridiculous.  And as a sidenote, my clique also included a Jake the harelip, lazy-eye Charlie, Stevie stump hands, Eskimo Ray, and Judy the cheetah.

Like Vincent Vega says in Pulp Fiction, you can travel around the world, but every country’s got pretty much the same shit.  The beauty’s in the little differences.  Take this trailer for Big Man Japan, for instance.  The idea’s pretty much the same as Hancock, but see if you can spot the tiny distinctions that make it oh so special.

A middle-aged slacker living in a rundown, graffiti-ridden slum, Daisato’s job involves being shocked by bolts of electricity that transform him into a stocky, stick-wielding giant several stories high who is entrusted with defending Japan from a host of bizarre monsters. But while his predecessors were national heroes, he is a pariah among the citizens he protects, who bitterly complain about the noise and destruction of property he causes. And Daisato has his own problems -an agent insistent on branding him with sponsor advertisements, an Alzheimer-afflicted grandfather who transforms into a giant in dirty underwear, and a family who is embarrassed by his often cowardly exploits. [Apple]

Did you catch the little difference?  It’s that they’re insane!  Wonderfully, funderfully mad!  After the jump, you really owe it to yourself to watch the trailer.  It looks like Yo Gabba Gabba if it were written more explicitly with the tripping-on-angel-dust crowd in mind.  Which is really all I’ve ever wanted.

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