02.06.09 FRI FREE FOR ALL: BILLY MAYS REDUB
Friday Free for All is that time of the week when hard-hitting exposés go out the window and funny videos grease themselves up and crawl through the pet door. Send your tips to lance@filmdrunk.com.
This week’s FF4A comes from Jabo0odyDubs, the YouTube user who overdubs Billy Mays videos and proves that I’m 10 years old. That’s right, just replace the real audio with a guy who says “shit” a few times, and pretty soon tears of laughter will be rolling down my cheeks, apparently. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to go eat paste and see if I can get Suzie Reynolds to flash me her panties for a couple fruit roll-ups. She’s a slut, she’ll probably do it.
[Thanks to YouTubeReviewed, Videogum]
There are 74 comments about:
FRI FREE FOR ALL: BILLY MAYS REDUB
Man, I thought I wanted one of these before. Now, I gotsta have one!
Billy Mays’ beard is made from velcro.
The same stuff I tie my shoes with.
His beard irritates my inner thighs
Isn’t shitty sliders kinda redundant?
“I got the meat, you got the taste” was, coincidentally, the slogan for Sarah Palin’s gubernatorial campaign.
All praise due to Allah for Mighty Mendit.
Or else all the king’s horses and all the king’s men and I would have never put Chodin’s asshole back together again.
Jessica Simpson can smell the celebrity endorsement dollars. Nope, sorry, that’s bacon grease and self-loathing.
I bet Billy Mays’ breath smells like milk and he waxes his chest.
Pauly, your seductive gaze is distracting me. I’m trying to think of something funny to say. Stop it.
Fuck you if you don’t like Billy Mays. NOTHING cleans skid marks out of white boxers like Oxy Clean.
NOTHING!!!ONE!
I think Dubs is behind this.
Incidentally, my apartment being “oxi-clean” doesn’t compare to when it’s “meth-clean.” Usually, this is necessary after a couple weeks of it being “weed-clean.”
There, Pauly scrolled away. Um …
“I always follow up Oxi-Clean with Donky-Dryer Sheets.”
Billy Mays’ next piece of shit will enable his products to show up in your house without you ever even calling in or seeing the fucking commercial.
Dammit, I didn’t know the domain “boxspots.com” was taken as that was the cornerstone of my plan to start a site catering to people with fetishes for pimply vaginas.
Billy Mays is the Narrator of my nightmares.
Anyone else see those greasy burgers and think “mutated womb”? No? Well, I’m off to White Castle cuz I want some fucking food.
best part: “What the fuck is that? Cat food?”
By the way, We Mayeses think the Mayses are a bunch of uncultured, inbred hicks that dilute a good name. Although I must admit I am thinking of Stickum-like applications of that Mighty Putty for my big comeback to the NFL.
QAPLAH! The Mighty Feklahr just got back from His favourite BBQ joint in the galaxy! Not only do they give you a spork for your baked beans, but they serve The Portoburger!
What’s so great about the Portoburger?
A. It’s a fat-ass burger with a BBQ grilled Portobella Mushroom cap on it!
B. It turns Mormons into MUTANTS!
“BILLY GODDAMN MAYES HERE!!!! TIRED OF NOT BEING ABLE TO CONTROL THE VOLUME OF YOUR FUCKING VOICE??? CHECK IT OUT, ALL YOU STONED TEENAGERS!!!!!”
*pulls out sub sandwich*
“WITH MY NEW ‘VOICE CONTROLLING RECTANGLE’ YOU CAN SHOVE IT IN YOUR MOUTH!!!!”
He’s selling his blue balls, I can’t even give mine away
Rotty-WTF?
Billy Mays’ Blue Balls, ass seen on TV.
“BILLY FUCKING MAYES HERE!!!! TIRED OF ALWAYS STEPPING IN YOUR DOG’S SHIT??? PEEP THIS, ALL YOU NATIVE AMERICANS!!!”
*pulls out a miniature model bridge*
“IT’S A DOG SHIT BRIDGE!!!! LAY IT OVER DOG SHIT AND THEN WALK ACROSS IT!!! PROBLEM SOLVED!!! FUCK ME!? FUCK YOU!!!!”
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