Hey, wanna see my impression of Keira Knightley?
Back when fake Warner Bros spokesman guy started, I never expected him to get so much mileage out of such a narrowly targeted schtick (see also his response to Batman, Turkey). But here he is, back with a new video (below) in response to the Christian Bale tirade. And he has something very important to say to all you haters out there.
“Batman Begins, The Dark Knight, American Psycho – what do these films have in common? They’re all films where Christian Bale plays himself, you cocksuckers. You think having a circus clown mother and years of steroids does nothing to the rage that builds inside of you? You better run, run and pray Christian Bale can’t find you.”
I find a good solution for nasty rage buildup is Metamucil. Metamucil and raquetball.
[thanks to Comedy.com]



Aren’t all studio spokesmen fake?
It’s time for Annnimaniacs!
theres baloney in our slacks!
I’m sorry, but after Bale’s little explosion, I just can’t see him in the same way anymore. He’s a totaly prick. Hang on just a sec…
*thumbs through yellow pages for a second, opens it up all the way. Picks up phone starts dialing while looking at the spot his finger is placed*
Hello? Helping Hands Humane Society? I was curious, how many times on average do you put dogs to sleep daily? Fifteen? Dude that is fucking awesome!…..Yeah, I know, that’s what I’m saying!…So how did you manage to land that job?…..no shit?….I totally would, but I’m making pretty decent money….I’ll keep it in mind…thanks dude
*hangs up phone*
So yeah, as I was saying, Bale is the worst kind of scum, in my opinion.
*closes phone book, places back on shelf*
A site with the URL “comedy.com” has to bleep out profanities?
Also, nice pink shirt dick.
If it’s any consolation, if Bale had actually hit that guy, he probably would have broken his own thumbs.
Brett Ratner wants Christian Bale to explode all over him.
Seriously, is that the Joe Isuzu guy?
“A circus clown mother and years of steroids” was also the original name of Affliction.
Looks like Steve Carrellovich to me.
Having a circus clown mother is not a laughing matter. I mean, do you know how embarrassing it is to have her drop you off at school in that little, teeny tiny car filled with other clowns and then when you go to kiss her goodbye, she squirts you in the face with the flower that’s pinned to her shirt?
He looks like Treat Williams’ brother Beat Williams.
So since he’s been impeached, Ron Blagojevich is trying comedy now?
Apparently, Christian Bale can’t find you if you stand perfectly still. He keys in on movement.
I guess the website is going for the ironic route. You know, the whole “not being funny” thing while having the “comedy.com” url.
That’s a terrible Kiera Knightley impression. His tits are way too big.
My favorite circus clown mother is the one who jammed eight baby clowns into her uterus.
The Christian Bale audio was leaked by Christian Bale in an attempt to personally embarrass Christian Bale. I’ve never heard anybody get so upset about dp. A2M, maybe.
dont you bad mouth Kiera Knightley you sunnavabitch!!
I’d bang Keira nightly, while screaming “are you professional or not?”
No more tranny pics? NO MORE FEKLAHR!
(Just kidding!)
I missed tranny pics?
Kurg-Dude, I uploaded them tranny pics to our NAMBLA newsgroup!
…
DOR SHO GHA!
Cyber Hi 5 nukka!