Even though JCVD turned an awesome concept into an annoying film school masturbation, it was worth it for bringing Van Damme back into the media spotlight. Not even Steven Seagal does a better interview.
“You know, like, we’re gonna do Bloodsport 2,” he told us in a recent interview. “Which was my first movie. And I want to do it now in a very mature way, where the guy from Bloodsport is a complete bum, maybe abusing his son.”
[On encountering resistance from the studio] “They told me, ‘No, no, no! You cannot make a movie in America where a father is abusing his son physically! It’s wrong.”
“And you cannot be a guy on drugs doing karate and shit like that.’ I said, ’Why? Why? Tell me why.’ It’s against the rules of success. But I believe the other rules of success. To show something real.” [TotalFilm]
Dear Studio Exec: Think about it, Bloodsport 2: Child Abuse and Drugs and Karate and Shit, starring Jean-Claude Van Damme and Gary Busey. The world is counting on you.
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Bloodsport 2: Child Abuse and Drugs and Karate and Shit
If they don’t call it that I will now be very disappointed.
That gif is a million times funnier if you happen to have Red Barchetta stuck in your head.
Studio Exec: You cannot make a movie in America where a father is abusing his son physically! It’s wrong.
JCVD: Well, not if you keep your wrist straight and follow through on the punch.
Depending on the kind of abuse, they can just call this Bloodsport 2: Buttsport.
Man, this just brings back so many bad memories of my dad getting liquored up and doing the splits.
This one will be called Blood, Sport.
Child Abusey.
I agree. Not beating your children shows a distinct lack of maturity… you know what leads to that kind of behavior… NOT doing drugs. Pfft.
“Double Impact 2 will center around twin brother incest because for the past 10 years the studios always tell me to go fuck myself.”
He wouldn’t beat his kid so much if the little fucker didn’t look so much like Bolo Yeung.
I hope he gets an erection on camera. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NHJ0v4RPfEs
JCVD’s rules to success:
1. beat children.
2. do drugs.
3. dance like nobody is watching.
JCVD’s plan for Sudden Death 2 is to get it aired on Versus.
So I do to the studio the same thing I do to a woman when she says “no no no” I go ahead and do it anyway without permission
That’s bullshit.
I’m a yellow belt and I get high all the time.
JCVD’s sequel for Time Cop will be called Time Card, about a constant reminder to clock out before leaving Target.
I wouldn’t abuse my kid.
I’d just bling him by throwing dust in his eyes and watch him walk around bumping unto shit.
I can’t wait for Universal Solder where JCVD plays a down-on-his-luck television repairman.
The third part to this new franchise will involve JCVD’s trip to the urologist: Bloodspurt.
Bloodsport 2: The Great Santini and Mommie Dearest meet the Karate Kid.
Bloodsport 2: JCVD vs. the Frozen Detroit Hobo (played by Bolo Yeung)
I have never abused my kid. He deserved every fuckin’ second of it.
I hope that Bloodsport 2 is a period piece.
It’s just like when I’d watch Bloodsport and my dad would start hitting and kicking me. My only sweet release was JCVD.