MATRIX CAT!
01.20.09Matrix Cat was just minding his own business when Agent Smith came along and tried to smell his asshole. Matrix Cat used his powers of slow motion kung fu to escape, but then Agent Smith cloned himself and Matrix Cat had to battle an army of identical Agent Smiths. Will he escape? Will they smell his asshole? Watch and find out! …Anyway, kitties and puppies. How could I not post it? I admit it’s no Hamster on a Piano.
[via Buzzfeed]

ohai. i can haz blank stare?
der iz no spun!
Matrix Cat says “Neow”
I have a sudden craving for crab rangoon.
Sign that cat up to start in Cowboy Bebop.
I can haz red pill?
I knows Kung-Fu.
Matrix Cat then went on to lick his own balls, causing Keanu Reeves to remark “Woah”.
I guess the next best thing to attending the Sundance Film Festival is surfing YouTube for cat videos.
I don’t care what you say, Keannu is still more of a pussy.
Those Agent Smiths don’t use Desert Eagles as weapons, they use their breath.
That reminds of the time I fell asleep in PetSmart and was damn near suckled to death.
What was that cat doing in a Korean kitchen anyway?
Perhaps Hamster On a Piano is his mentor, Dwarfeus.
*saddles up in the corner with a Piss Boot full of hope*
I learned about sex when I came home from school one day and found my lab on one side of the fence still stuck inside the asshole of my beagle on the other side of the fence. That should totally be in the Matrix Cat sequel.
The ending to the trilogy is two hours worth of Matrix Cat using the litterbox.
“Misssterrr Aannnderrrsooon, you wanna play ball!?!? Do ya?!?! Huh?! C’mon, let’s play ball!!!!”
“The Architect” is just some guy with tipped over water bowls and a quarter-inch deep of animal shit all around the floor of his house.
Wait until he meets the Meowvingian.
There’s no harm with letting a dog smell your asshole. What the fuck is wrong with that uptight cat.