More like Mich-yell Rodriguez, am I right? High five? Anyone?
The new 4 Fast 4 Furious trailer hit the web today (watch it below), and I’m definitely digging the parkour-y cholo chase scene. Between people crashing through windows and watching Paul Walker try to act*, it’s pretty exciting. From there, Soldja Boy plays, hoes get supermanned, and Vin Diesel and Hardcore Rodriguez come face to face with a flaming, out of control gas tanker. Rodriguez is all, “Dom? Dom?” and then Vin Diesel guns the engine and drives straight for it! Because the only way to escape an extreme situation is to… BE MORE EXTREME!!! AND WHEN THE GOING GETS XXXTREME, THE XXXTREME GET… MORE XXXXXXTREEEEMER!!!!! OOO WHA-AA AA AA!!!!
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Does his shoulders say “lick cocks”?
Oh man, for a second I was like, Where’s the racing? And then BAM!!! THERE’S THE FUCKING RACING!
Paul Walker could never catch up to a mexican speed walking.
Instead of watching the “4 Fast 4 Furious” trailer, I accidentally watched the “Paul Blart, Mall Cop” ad. And I liked it!
Please help me.
This is exactly like when I ordered a Mountain Dew from the Puerto Rican at Sbarro’s.
Banner pic: MGM Studios present…
Banner pic: Michyell does her impersonation of her vagina.
Con DENTATA!!
Does anyone else think Vin Diesel looks like a king-size Vern Troyer?
Wow Juan, I always thought he looked like somebody else from Hollywood, but could never put the pieces together. You’re the man.
Lince, you better stop broadcasting to South Carolina…
scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2009/01/close_your_eyes_if_youre_in_so.php
Who names their kid Dom?
They were planning to have even more Mexicans in the flick, but the studio didn’t have raft parking.
Banner pic: “EXXXTREME ROADHEAD!”
Zac Efron joined the cast as Dom’s brother Fem.
Burnsy, if that had read:
Zac Efron joined the cast as Dom’s brother Sub.
It would have been perfect. No, I mean it. Literal perfection. *sigh*
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh…..
this movie’s gonna suck shit.
That banner pic is terrifying me. She’s going to bite right through his jawbone.
You know what I like? A nice Werther’s Original.
“Give me a name!”
“Uh . . . ‘Poor Man’s Keanu Reeves’?”
Banner Pic: “Bullshit motherfucker! It does too feel like a Wednesday! Say it! SAY IT!”
Dom. Dom. Dom dom dom, dom badoobie dom.
Wah wah wah waha.
Banner Pic: M-Rod’s audition for the remake of V.
I seriously don’t know what’s shittier. The trailer or the trailer music.
*puts on Soulja Boy sunglasses, does the “Runnin’ Man”*
If I was in a car with Michelle Rodriguez, I’d try to kill us both too.
I haven’t been this scared since I was 7 and watching the opening from Land of the Lost.
“I FUCKING LOVE TACOS!!!!!!!!”
“HI!!!! I’M JULIE FROM TIME-LIFE!!!”
So if Vin wanted to follow Robert Downey Jr.s lead would he go with blackface or whiteface?
“DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY-OH, DAAAAAAAAY AAY AAY-OH”
!!!!PRESS ONE FOR ENGLISH!!!!
“CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW???????????”
“I’M FURIOUS!!!!!!!!!”
“GET ME A WHOPPER!!!!”
Bitches who raise their voice at me find out how strong my pimp hand is.
“I TOLD YOU, I’M NOT ALLOWED TO DRIVE ANYMORE! QUIT BITCHING AND GET US TO BRANSON!!!”
wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world? “NYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
SHAM-WOW!!!
“GIVE ME A MINT, CABRON!!!!!”
“KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHN!!!!”
“NEW UP!!!!!!!!!!!!”
(not really, but she’d totally yell that)
“YOU’RE WHY NO COUPLES WANT TO HANG OUT WITH US ANYMORE! SHARON SAID SO!!!!!!!”
“DOR SHO GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
“HADOOOOOOOUUUUUKKKENNNNN!!!!!”
“NINE THOUUUUUUUUUUUUUSAAAAAAAAAAAND!!!”
“EGOISTE!!!”
Banner Pic:
Invisible John Holmes
(That’s Vin’s power level)
new up, now with more words!
DO I have something in my teeth? I feel like I have something in my teeth. Look. Looooook! Do you have a toothpick? Floss? I always keep some floss with me. I knew I shouldn’t have put my purse in the trunk… GUM?! Do you have any gum? Sometimes if I have something stuck in my teeth and I don’t have floss or a toothpick or something I chew gum. I don’t want to get a canker! I can’t stop messing with it with my tongue and that will give me a canker I know it! I hate when…
I read the plot for the next movie online today. It’s called “The Fast and the Furious 5: FREE BASE!”
It’s not so scared anyway!
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So they didn’t think the first film was enough of a Point Break rip-off that they needed to add a foot chase as well?
So, this is what happens when someone takes two of the best parts of the new James Bond movies and the Bourne movies, and does them terribly.