It’s pretty well known that Tina Fey never talks about the little scar on her left cheek. Luckily, she also has a husband who’s just happy when someone wants to talk to him. He recently revealed his wife’s scar origin in an interview with Vanity Fair:
Jeff Richmond says a stranger slashed Fey’s face when she was 5 years old.
The future TV star was playing in the front yard of her Upper Darby, Penn., home when a stranger approached the young Fey and violently cut her cheek.
Says Richmond: “That scar was fascinating to me. This is somebody who, no matter what it was, has gone through something. And I think it really informs the way she thinks about her life.” [AP]
Yeah, I can totally understand that. It’s like when I was five and I pissed my pants on a field trip to the zoo, and to this day I still cry like a baby whenever I see zebra print. That was also the year I stopped breastfeeding. I don’t really know where I was going with this, but if I had to choose someone on 30 Rock to get their face slashed, it’d definitely be Judah Friedlander. He could wear a hat that says “OUCH MY FACE!”
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All I can say is that my dad has lousy aim.
“… and to this die…”
Subliminal messages? You bastard.
That’s kind of a boring story, no wonder nobody ever talks to him. If he were really interesting, he would have given the stranger a dangerous back story and the assault would have been all edgy and shot in shaky-cam; Rated R.
and to this die I still cry like a baby whenever I see zebra print.
You’re fascinated with my avatar, aren’t you, Vince.
I was hoping she was cut in retaliation for her role as a mob informant…
The true story is that she walked in on her dad sitting on his hand getting ready to jerk off and he got angry.
Stranger? Hardly. That man was Gary Busey.
Tina Fey: Proof that you shouldn’t play doctor with the neighbor boy who tortures stray animals.
Richmond changes the story every time he tells it.
Tina Fey: Wanna know how I got these scars? My father was….a drinker. And a fiend. And one night he goes off crazier than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn’t like that. Not. One. Bit. So, me watching, he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it. Turns to me and he says “Why so serious?” Comes at me with the knife,”Why so serious?” He sticks the blade in my mouth. “Let’s put a smile on that face!”
After he let the cat out of the bag, Richmond isn’t allowed to suck Fey’s dick anymore.
Fuckin’ A, Burnsy.
A stranger did it?
So Tina Fey sat on her hand until it was numb, and cut her own cheek?
Upside-down or right-side-up, it’s been done already.
That scar was fascinating to me. This is somebody who, no matter what it was, has gone through something.
This guy’s gonna have to bring an extra pair of underwear to the new Punisher movie then…
Yeah, but yours wasn’t funny.
Not to mention the Lion King!
Get over it, Jack.
This is somebody who, no matter what it was, has gone through something.
Sunday I went through six Taco Bell Volcano burritos, a six pack of MGD and then three pair of underwear.
God, I want a volcano taco for dinner.
I thought she got it from learing how to crack a bull-whip?
I thought she got into a knife fight with Tracy Morgan?
I thought she got that scar from a bar room brawl after Luis Guzman broke a Dos Equis bottle on the bar and sliced her with the jagged handle?
I thought she got that from a nasty uni-cycle accident?
I thought she got that from fuckin’ around with ninja stars?
I ♥ Tina. That is all.
I thought I posted this here before? A guy walked up to her and asked for directions, then said something about what a pretty face she has while running his hand down her cheek, then she realized he had cut her face as he was leaving. They never caught the guy, either. That’s fucked up.
Maybe she should learn how to give directions, Robo.
That blade must’ve been as
big as my dicksharp as my wit for her not to have felt it.Either way, it is a more interesting story than how Jim Carrey chipped his tooth when trying to blow Michelangelo’s David during a class field trip.
The Mighty Feklahr wonders why Edward James Olmos never told the story about the cheese grater that asked him for directions?
Seal admitted that his facial (hehe) scars were from when they tried to cut the face grabber alien off of him and it bled all over.
I don’t see any scar. VaLince, could you have found a picture where you can see the scar?
A GIS of “Tina Fey facial scaring” did not get me what I wanted.
The Mighty Feklahr wonders why Joan Rivers never told the story about the carpet stretcher that asked her for directions?
…arring… yarrgh… ing…
I wonder if Jigsaw will ever explain that he did Lexi Alexander’s Punisher because he got lock jaw from sucking so much dick for Oxycontin money.
Guy’cha! Have a piss boot to wash down this Durst Dumpling, Crap?
This has exactly shit to do with shit, but I just remembered this book I read in junior high (a Piers Anthony Xanth novel). Anyway, this kid was able to basically fucking grow a braindead “nymph” (kind of like a nature fairy) out of these special seeds and by pissing on it every day.
So after this nymph is full grown, you can basically do whatever you want to it. It would kind of be like being the Omega Man only to find out that Terri Shiavo is still hooked up to her machine.
Anyway, he boinks it for a few weeks until his dad finds it and makes him put it down. :( I bet the old codger took some sloppy seconds, first.
Oh, also, today at work they were handing out bludgeoning weapons to the drivers. I am going to go steal one before I go home.
The sad thing about His last post is that all of it is true except the part where He steals one.
Fek, did you ever read his chronicles of the incarnations? ‘Riding a Pale Horse’ et al.
Also… GRRRRR….. GRIM REAPER!!!
How is she gonna get a scar like that from eating pussy?
Tina Fey will have more facial damage when I put stretch marks around her mouth. I’m talkin’ bout STRETCH!! MARKS!!
Yeah, I stole that from Katt Williams. Sue me.
Vagina Dentata, Pauly.
Note to Tina Fey: The less clothes you wear, the less we’ll stare at your scar.
Richmond giving out Tina’s secret like that must’ve scarred her for life.
*slams head on keyboard, knocking self out for the night*