Yes yes, the movie’s called Lesbian Vampire Killers, it’s all very kitschy and provocative. Say the title a few more times, I don’t think people will remember it yet. Look, guys, it’s a good name (and according to the Wikipedia page, the whole project started with a challenge to come up with the most commercial film title ever), but you’re really gonna have to work a little harder . This is the internet. I can find underage girls getting a golden shower from a rhinoceros if I look hard enough. If you want to outdo the Japanese, someone’s going to have to lactate and/or explode.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/bourneleagcyteaserposter-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/monsieur_lazhar__ver2_C-Tates-150x150.jpg)
These bitches LOVE to get their “red wings”.
They could’ve done better. Like “Lesbian Vampire Killers from Outer Space.” Or “Lesbian Vampire Killers in Bikinis.”
Why would anybody want to kill lesbian vampires?
So, are they people that kill “Lesbian Vampires”, or “Lesbian Vampires” that kill people, or Lesbians that kill Vampires?
Either way, He is sure this will star Rosie O’Donnell and her famous “Garlic Tuna Pie”, guy’Cha!
Why would lesbians want to kill vampires?
The only way to kill a Lesbian Vampire is a wooden dildo to the uterus.
So they didn’t call it Lesbian Vampire Killers Presented by Geico…
I was wondering the same thing, but I think it’s people who kill lesbian vampires?
Proof that, no matter how hard they try, studios will never come up with a title as self-explanatory as Snakes on a Plane.
Lesbian vampires don’t mind crosses as much as they mind the sight of a guy holding a door open for them.
Since they’re lesbians, i’m safe, right? i wonder if they’d mind if i just sat in a chair in the corner of the room and watched? i promise to use my sock as a recptacle, you know?
I’m guessing they use sharpened field hockey sticks as weapons?
Lesbian vampires don’t care that they can’t see their own reflections; their girlfriends are always there to make sure they look their prettiest.
I can at least take solace in the fact that, when this movie flops, someone is going to lose a shitload of money. Life is always worthwhile if you remember that.
Better than Dyke Death Dealers…no wait, it’s not.
I’ll give them this – at least it’s not a fucking remake, sequel, or video-game based movie….
It’s so hard to get anything done at work when I wear a hand bra.
Lesbian Vampires support gay marriage, as long as it’s not to a man. With Blood?
hehe handle bras
Lesbian vampires are bringing back the goth-with-a-mullet look.
Stoney-or comic book :(
Lesbian vampires are masters of stalking their prey. Birkenstocks are very quiet.
You can only kill them with whittled down softball bats.
Lesbian vampire bats only bite cats.
Finally, Hollywood has a role for Lindsay Lohan!
It’s only fair that the lesbian vampires get their own movie. The gay vampires already got Twilight.
I’ll be showing myself the door now.
What’s the difference between a Vietnamese city blood-drive worker and a lesbian vampire?
One draws blood and eats pussy, the other is Vietnamese.
Why not TITS – THE MOVIE?
Great. Just get it over with and set it in Alaska and call it 30 Days of Dyke.
Lesbian vampires learned quickly to stop turning girls before they graduated from college in order to keep their numbers from fluctuating too much.
I hear that if you get a friend to beat up on your kidneys really badly, you can get a lesbian vampire to suck your dick.
Actually, I kind of wish this movie was about me, meaning it was a documentary that followed me through the streets of Birmingham, Alabama, carry a shotgun, and killing anyone I perceive to be either “Lesbian” or “Vampire” or “Kill-Worthy”.
The plot twist comes when I arrive drunk at a daycare at “Curves” (gym for fatso housewives).
I’ve been bored out of my mind all day and then I realized it’s Monday. I love vacations.
A more commercial title would be Bilight.
Or Revenge of the Titfuckers. Because right away you’re wondering, why do *they* want revenge?
This is too gory for me. I’ll stick with Bicurious Schoolgirl Pillowfighters.
Surprisingly less hetero new up
BWA HA HA HA HAAAAAAA! You guys fall for it every time, WHA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAA!
I can find underage girls getting a golden shower from a rhinoceros if I look hard enough.
pssst. Lance! I’ve got kids here dude. Everything you said is fine, it’s just that I told mine that it’s pronounced Rhinosaurus. Just FYI, don’t expose my lies.
AH WWOOOOOOOOOO HA HA HA…still laughing about that…after all this time…
It’s still no Hotel For Dogs.
Lezstat?
Bram StrokeHer Crackula
Are you guys really going to let me durst on that??? I hope you all get attacked by lesbian vampires and they steal all your Home Depot gift cards that you got for Christmas.
These pretzels are making me dursty.
Vince, those better not be YOUR thumbs blockin’ them titties.
Bilight? I fuckin love it.
Fags
And why would anyone even try to out-weird the Japanese? It can’t be done.
They’re already shooting the sequel, “homo werewolf resuscitators”.
Hammer already did this very nicely, thank you, in the 60s with The Vampire Lovers. Madeline Smith’s boobs for the win.
MC Hammer?
Only if this movie has an explosion will it truly have everything.