Sylvester Stallone was recently in India to shoot a Bollywood film with Denise Richards and Brandon Routh. The headline accompanying the news story about it was “Stallone was very impressed with Indians.” Above is an artist’s rendition of what that might have looked like.
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“Ya know, I usually kill brown people, ya know….”
“Ya know they smell like curry and have ugly feet, ya know, but they’re good people”
When it comes to Indo-Asian foreigners, Stallone uses gut-feelings. If he feels like stabbing them in the guts, they’re most likely Burmese or Afghani.
For a foreign chick, that bitch is pretty fine, benny lava.
He just went to India to see if he could buy Paulie a flying carpet.
“A, yo, uh selling crappy lighters for a buck fifty power!”
A quote from the article:
He is like a baby in front of the director. He is as simple as anybody else.
Fuck context, that shit is funny.
Stallone was very impressed with Indians and our way of working. Akshay and Stallone would discuss their workouts, gym routines and trainings.
Apparently, Indian men don’t ever hit on their women.
Yo Aadarshini!!!
The part about Stallone that the Indians liked most was that he never tried asking any of them how to make the speakers on his Dell work right.
Yo, yous should see what deez gize do wit doze snakes! Dey juss play a floot tipah thing, and deez freakin’ snakes juss sit der an lissun to em! Dat’s preddy freakin’ impressive!
Harrison Ford would have pulled out a gun and shot that guy.
“Hey, you know, what’s the big deal about doing a foreign film with a bunch of Indians? I mean, it was good enough for Clint Eastwood forty years ago, it’s good enough for me.”
So they filmed Throw Vishnu from the Train?
Stop, or My Bindi Will Shoot?
Above is an artist’s rendition of what that might have looked like.
Easy there, Thomas Kincade…
That Indian dude kinda looks like Che.
Shiva Le Revolucion!
Meanwhile, Frank Stallone was very impressed with the lamb biryani he ordered last night.
“Stallone was credited as saying “kali ma!!!” then he proceeded to rip out the man’s heart and eat it.”
Poor Great Tiger. His hand-eye coordination has gotten really bad.
MOST American filmmakers who go to India are impressed, as they are when they go to Hong Kong. Over there, they find really skilled film professionals who don’t have the chip on their shoulder that American filmmakers do. (I say this as an American film technician.) There’s a reason that India cranks out two or three times as many films in a year than the US, and they are usually an hour longer and have twice as many “BIG SCENES”. In India, they work like crazy, they aren’t nickel-and-diming the producers according to union rules, and they all take PRIDE in the work. Foreign film pro’s rock. American and European film pro’s are wusses. (IMHO)