RYAN REYNOLDS ALSO NEEDS A NEW AGENT
12.10.08
OMG, a hot naked girl on me! Getitoffgetitoffgetitoff!
Below we have the new trailer for The Proposal, a totally inspired rom-com starring Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock. She’s his boss, and they have to get married so she doesn’t get deported. Let me get this straight, two ridiculously good-looking people are forced into a pretend relationship by circumstance? OH MY GOD, I WONDER WHAT THE F-CK WILL HAPPEN???? *slams dick in car door*
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I hope Sandra Bullock gets hit in the face with a wrecking ball.
If this doesn’t end with Ryan Reynolds rubbing all the cash he won in a hostile workplace lawsuit on his abs, then this film is DEAD 2 ME.
Dude, she already did.
YES! I finally have a reason to ask Becky from Crispers to the movies.
Burnsy you should take her to Crate and Barrel after, I hear they’re having a sale!
Be sure to tell her that great one about the three blondes in the bar! ROFL!
I think the perfect way to trap Sandra Bullock would be to get a giant paper bag and challenge her to act her way out of it. Then, when she goes into the bag, drop an anvil onto it.
Or you could just wait for her to starve to death. Whatever floats your boat.
Aw hell yeah I’ll take that even in black and white, thanks Vance.
Burnsy, you’re not supposed to go full retard, remember?
I dunno, Bullock’s looking alright here, not Demolition Man good, but good enough. Oh, and just how fucking buff does an actor need to be to play an office drone? Reynolds needs to relax, put his feet up, watch some tv.
Gawd, I hate this kind of movie so much. I honestly don’t know why people would pay to see it, since you can guess exactly what will happen from the description alone.
At least Ryan can make up for this as Deadpool. Hopefully.
It must be difficult for Ryan Reynolds to act the part of a dude who falls for a hot chick, when in real life his track record includes Alanis Morissette.
I’m rather have one hand in my pocket and then other one holding a Donny Osmond headshot.
If a movie was made about a male boss telling a female employee, “Marry me or you’re fired” it would be a Lifetime movie and the guy would get shot “totally in self defense” by the end.
D2M!
**Quietly hides Donny & Marie barbie dolls in desk drawer**
I’d rather fuck two guys, kill a girl and burn down a pizza parlore, than go see this movie.
The words “Sandra” and “Bullock” can cure
impotence.True story: I actually had a Marie Osmond barbie doll.
I did not ask for it. She got a funky new haircut.
If I had the choice of marrying my boss or losing my job, my only question would be “who’s wearing the dress?”
The Lifetime ending would be preferable for the actor. No chance of a sequel.
I want Gerrard Butler and Ryan Reynolds to make the first big budget homosexual RomCom. Although the movie would be rated A: for Abs.
Ohhhhh, I’d really like to go see the Osmonds. Are they in Branson or Vegas this time of year?
Chodin, so you mean you would rather relive last week than see this movie?
Have I mentioned that I detest Sandra Bullock?
The only way this movie could be less realistic is if it involved Michael Douglas having to fight off unwanted sexual advances from his female boss.
I want some of whatever the exec who greenlighted this dreck was shooting up.
… and chod, in real life Ryan Reynolds is also marrying Scarlet Johannsen, who some would argue is heat incarnate. Personally, I think marrying her is the Hollywood equivalent of being the last guy done and having to eat the cracker.
snazzyjas11, what the fuck is your problem!?
Last week was “fuck four dudes, blow a dog and then burn down my ex-girlfriend’s house”. Click “refresh” on my Yahoo calendar.
Erm, I meant Angelina Jolie and Kelly Brooke to make the first big budget homosexual RomCom. Rated G for Juggs.
GRRRRR SAPHIC EROTICA!!!!
And you’re right Charlie she isn’t looking too bad in this..
..but oh how I do despise that woman..
I’m convinced that the harder your abs get, the less funny you become.
Dubs and I…we’re two unfunny fuckers.
Stinky…I like the way you Peet.
I liked the bit in the trailer where a CGI Reynolds turns the steering wheel of the boat. Odd, that.
I have an idea for a RomCom. Gerry Buttler is Ryan Reynolds boss in a woman’s magazine. One night after finishing that month’s issue, they have some office margaritas. Then they have a competition to see who can grate the most cheese using their abs. The loser has to be the catcher.
And that movie is a lot hotter, more interesting and original than any movie Sandra Bollocks has ever ‘acted’ in.
Sorry, shirtless Ryan Reynolds turns me a bit gay. Or maybe it is Sandra Bollocks sexy face…?
Yes – Ryan Reynolds needs to stop taking rolls where he makes out with hot chicks. Maybe he can land a nice part as a glory hole mop-man that gets raped by a rabid zebra that escaped from a circus.
I wager I could fuck the perky right out of Sandra.
“I loved you in Wrestling Hemmingway!!”
Stone, a glory hole mop-man that gets raped by a rabid zebra that escaped from a circus?
Story of my life, man…
I blew my chances with a girl that looked like a cross between Shania Twain and Sandra Bullock, just because she was “engaged”.
I just couldn’t do Sandra Bollocks, I’m sorry, it’s just that I haven’t fucked a bikers scraps since I left the Mongols in ’92.
Stoney, was it because you said you didn’t want to play doctor?
I’d rather have Dave Coulier’s sloppy seconds than watch this movie.
She’s gonna be having second thoughts about being married once he starts playing the dick-showing game he learned at Shenannigan’s.
Ryan Reynolds keeps trying to ab fuck me.
Donkey, nice call back… No. I stopped chasing when she mentioned the fiance’. I was quite the Burnsy.
I’d rather have Dave Coulier’s sloppy seconds than watch this movie.
Mr. Woodchuck?
This may be my vagina talking but I want to see this.Get it? It’s funny because I don’t really have a vagina.
Sandra Bullock’s kicking herself for using the ol’ “Give yourself your own TV show to keep from getting deported” trick on George Lopez.
I’d rather fuck Harvey Bullock.
Anyone?
I bet Fek got it.
moodysex/lovesounds, it’s funny because we know you felt the sharp pain of regret after you clicked that “Sumbit Comment” button.
I could be wrong, but in the banner pic, I think Ryan is pulling the “oops, it slipped into your butt” move I’m fond of using.
Banner pic cap: (said in gargling voice) I said warn me before you came! Here comes the snowball mouthfucker!
I bet Beek got it too, Jack.
I didn’t though, what’s that all about?
Either Sandra sweats her ass off during sex or she has the worst fucking set of dreads I’ve ever seen.
If I had abs like Ryan Reynolds, I’d strut around in tube tops.
Tube tops way sexier than the ones I already wear.
I bet she sweats her balls off too, J.
Jim J. Bullock > Sandra Bullock
Seth Bullock > Sandra Bullock
Let’s straighten this out:
Jm (no “i”) J. Bullock > all you fuckers.
Never Mind The Bollocks > Sandra Bullock
Jimmy Bullard > Jim J. Bullock
He got me 9 points this weekend. Back of the net.
Jack speaks the truth – there is no “i” in Jm J Bullock, only a “u”.
Hiram Bullock > Sandra Bullock
there is no “i” in Jm J Bullock, only a “u”.
And a penis.
{puts on perpetual roid rage Deadwood Olyphant face. Through clinched teeth says} You should be watchin what comments you make about a lady like that Swearengen.
You guys know too much about the center square.
Eating Bullcock > Watching Bullock
Spurting bull cock > Sandra Bullock
Here’s my secret shame.
One night, I got stinking drunk at the bar, and brought home a hot chick. When I woke up the next morning, I saw Sandra Bullock lying next to me.
I have the Bullock-see Blues.
Great minds think alike.
About bull cock.
I heart you, Crappy.
Sucking bullcock
> Sandra Bullocknasty.Cut it out, J and Robo.
He wasn’t the center square.
He was the top middle square.
Hillaire de Belloc > Sandra Bullock.
What about watching Bullock take a bullcock?
Must be a midwest thing oboPan. Show of hands, how many of you goofy fuckers in here have ever eaten Rocky Mountain Oysters?
*raises both hands*
Rocky Mountain Oysters = Prairie Oysters?
how many of you goofy fuckers in here
Hey, I didn’t fuck Goofy. I fucked Mickey. He so fine.
Jesus fucking christ wept! To hell with The Stath…give me more Shirtless Dude from 2 Guys and A Girl!!!
If Prairie Oysters are the testicles from a bovine, swine, turkey, sheep or Cherokee, then yes.
JessicaD, if you like that, you should check out
me in the showerBlade Trinity. He’s shirtless and sweaty quite a bit in it. I love that movie because my wife wants to have sex every time she sees it. Usually with me.Can you wear out a DVD?
I always thought they should call them Rocky Mountain Boysters.
JCH, yes (raises enthusiastic hand). Delish.
I like them too, Al. Every year there’s a little town east of Lincoln that has a “Testicle Festival” where they serve those and copious amounts of beer. Good time.
I afraid to go into Rocky Mountain Toy Stores.
Ray Liotta eats Pocky Mountain Oysters.
Just so everyone is on the same page with Al, JCH is my twin brother that only says he’ll put just the tip in, then go balls deep on you. So you’re aware.
JHC, it would be worth the trip to that little town east of Lincoln just so I can tell my friends I went to a “Testicle Festival”. Is it sometime around the end of June, by any chance? I might be in the area.
“Fuck the cum wads/
I want the balls that’re makin’ ‘em!”
CHJ, are you making fun of my dyslexia? Shut the fuck up.
Al’s lysdexic? I didn’t know she was into chicks!
I thought the test tickle festival is when they did a QC check on all the Tickle Me Elmos.
{Looks with concern at tickets to event bought for daughter}
No one thought it was strange that I showed up shortly before fellow Canadian LaLa disappeared? ;)
They usually have it on Father’s Day weekend. Knowing Nebraskans the way I do, that was not meant to be ironical, they just got lucky.
Being Nebraskan, I don’t know if ironical is even a word, but wordpress isn’t telling me otherwise.
I shit you not I was just going through some older posts in the archive and thought about AGB/LaLa.
BTK – don’t get excited. Al is not dyslexic for Lala. I’d have to be Alal then.
So, during this Testicle Festival, do all the butchers take out Nads Ads in the local papers?
For the record, I’d hammer Khloe Kardashian like a ten penny nail.
I’m pretty sure if you were Alal you’d be randomly searched at airports a lot more often.
I’m one of the few around here that can read Chino, so no.
J, ironical works for me.
Of course good looking people are always together. It wasn’t called “Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Face,” was it?
New Up!
Al, I always just figured you pulled out a broad sword[sic] and cut her head off yelling, “There canuck be only one, eh!”
I thought Ironical was that lego set that worked with Wonder Blocks.