12.08.08 JULIAN SCHNABEL IS A GIANT D-BAG
Julian Schnabel most recently directed The Diving Bell and the Butterfly, but before that, he was an artist who did stuff like paint a gigantic version of a painting he found in a junk yard and charge $6 million for it. If that’s not enough to know he’s a pompous douche, he also wears yellow glasses, and at the Director’s Guild awards this year, he was giving an acceptance speech and going “Uhhh… Ummm…. Hmmm…” when Sean Young shouted “Get on with it!”, which was what everyone else was thinking. At which point he got all hurt and stormed off the stage like a little girl. Similarly, during this recent 60 Minutes profile, Morley Safer asks him about a critic (video after the jump):
“Your old nemesis, Robert Hughes once said of your work, you are to painting what Stallone is to acting.”
At which point Schnabel gets pissed and refuses to answer any more questions. That’s right, he’s indignant about being compared to cinema’s most prolific killer of villainous Asians. He’ll copy a painting he found in the trash and charge $6 million for it, but if anyone questions him about it, they’re just being big meanies. I will give him this: Julian Schnabel is the Babe Ruth of hipster dickweeds.
The question that sands Schnabel’s vagina is at the 8:17 mark.
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There are 75 comments about:
JULIAN SCHNABEL IS A GIANT D-BAG
I like to think of myself as the Babe Ruth of pompous asshats. But only on the weekends.
The 8:17 mark? Where did this sudden assumption that we have attention spans come from?
I pissed on a snowbank in the shape of a star once, yet you don’t see me getting bent out of shape because the cop said I was lacking in judgement.
The 8:17 mark? Where did this sudden assumption that we have attention spans come from?
The assumption was that you’d skip to the 8:17 mark, genius.
The cute part is that Julian Schnabel thinks he’s wearing 3-D goggles.
I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly. What are we talking about?
I like to wear yellow tinted glasses so that when my wife asks why there’s pee all over the toilet seat, I can honestly tell her I don’t see what she’s talking about.
If Sean Young ever told me to “get on with it”, I’d fucking Donkey Punch the whore.
“Uhhh… Ummm…. Hmmm…” when Sean Young shouted “Get on with it!”
Does anyone else go through this exact same exchange while having sex? With or without sean Young of course
Julian Schnabel always forgets that he’s wearing his glasses and just assumes that everyone is a coward.
I got $10 and a buy one get one free buffet coupon at Golden Corral for one of my enema paintings a few years back, so fuck ya’ll.
bamitsthemac, I’m more of a “If you fucking make a noise, I’ll cut you” kind of guy.
What you guys fail to realize is, is that if you look at Julian’s art through yellow glasses, it looks a little less like shit. Just a little.
I don’t know about you, but the Hudson River is about 376th on the list of rivers that I want to be able to
smelloverlook from my house.*doesn’t think that’s grammatically correct, but doesn’t give a Schnabel*
Sean Young is crazy, but not so Tom Cruise batshit that I can’t enjoy Blade Runner.
And shouldn’t yelling at hipster douchebags be an honorable profession?
Julian Schnabel’s other glasses have slinky eyes attached to them.
The Mighty Feklahr did a painting of Yorick’s s skull sitting on a tree-stump, bleeding from the eyes. Lince can have it for 6 million pesos.
When i was a kid i won a prize of two book tokens for drawing Asterix the Gaul’s face on an egg once. Bet that thing’s fucking priceless now.
Morley’s lucky he didn’t come with the, “Do you ever get people on the street saying, if you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball?”.
Even M. Night Shamaliadingdong thinks this fuckstain is a pretentious dickweed.
chodin, that takes forethought to actually get the knife. I’m more of the “spur of the moment” that starts with terror and ends with dissapointment and Herpes.
bamitsthemac, you’re not reading far enough into things: my dick IS the knife.
“Schnabel” is what my Asian roommate always wants to play on Saturday nights.
“Schnabel” is what my retarded cousin always wants to drink.
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