FIFTH SEASON OF LOST SNEAK PREVIEW
12.03.08The fifth season of Lost premieres Wednesday January 21st, and ABC just released this two-minute preview. In it, lawyers (who are they working for???) show up at Kate’s house, demanding that she and Aaron (wait, Aaron, that was the name of that insufferable Australian bitch’s kid!!) submit to blood tests. But Kate won’t do it! Atta girl, Freckles! Could the black smoke monster have something to do with this?? And what of the polar bears?? And who’s been waxing Sawyer’s chest all this time?? And how did people stranded on an island gain access to the latest fashions in designer jeans?? DAMN YOU, ABRAMS!! YOU EXPLAIN YOURSELF RIGHT NOW!!!
Also: anyone else suspect that JJ Abrams is the real-life Ben Linus?



Dude, every time you post a worthless fucking article about Lost, a little piece of what is left of my soul cries itself to death.
Also: anyone else suspect that JJ Abrams is the real-life Ben Linus?
More like a Linus van Pelt.
Every time a blogger posts a pre-season publicity story about “Lost,” an angel loses its wings and gets gang-sodomized by the ghosts of Gary Busey’s previous lives.
Until you fuckers start filming unauthorized reality and give me something to write about, this will have to do.
Every time you post about Lost, I come a little closer to finishing my AICN registration as Jar Jar Burnsy.
Come on, Lince. There has to be some tenuous movie-related link to the Avery/Cuthbert story. Let’s go for the Uproxxx trifecta!
Every time you post something about “Lost” it makes me wonder “What the fuck is ‘Lost’? Does anybody actually watch this shit?”
How about a clip montage from the Mighty Ducks trilogy? That’s certainly better than Lost.
Every time you post something about “Lost” it makes baby Jesus cry
“Until you fuckers start filming unauthorized reality and give me something to write about, this will have to do.”
*laughs* Vince, you silly dick, you. Do you think I WANT to have the FBI knocking at my door?
Everytime you post something about “Lost”, Aimless Leon busts a nut.
People tell me this show is very good, but I tried to watch it once and the damn Sleestaks never showed up.
Every time you post something about Lost, Pauly and I think that maybe it was wrong to slaughter those toddlers.
Burnsy, those little fucks had it coming. Someone in that pre-school stole my fat green Crayola with the frog on it.
Hey! Somebody in my office just stole my new fat green Crayola with the fro . . . ummm . . . my favorite pen. Carry on.
I’m as excited for a new season of Lost as I was for the second season of Designing Women.
I care more about tonight’s new “mind-blowing” episode of House of Payne than I do about the new season of Lost.
I’d only watch “Lost” if they stunt cast Nic Cage to show up and punch that bear. And even then I’d just DVR it and skip the other 56 minutes.
*adds “Finally finish season 3 DVDs of Lost” to to-do list*
new up + hot ass – polar bears
I enjoy Lost, so there. *sticks tongue out* More so now they killed off the hobbit. Still miss Mr Eko though.
I have a sickness. I think Ben is hot. I’m not sure why. Maybe the fact his eyes look like they are going to explode out of his skull at any moment. I dunno.
(hangs head in shame)