CRUISE ON LETTERMAN, SOME LINKS
12.18.08Here’s Tom Cruise doing the Top Ten list on Letterman the other night. God he’s a creepy bastard (see extended laughing fit at the 2:30 mark). He also can’t pronounce the word “Heimlich”. Congratulations, Scientology, your prophet can barely read. [DeadlineHollywoodDaily]
Here’s a new still from Quentin Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds, featuring Jacky Ido as Marcel and Melanie Laurent as Shosanna. By my calculations, you have now seen 1/172,800th of this movie. Barely worth watching the rest at this point. [Filmz.ru]
A video showing what Karate Kid would be like if Mr. Miyagi spoke better English. See Hollywood? These are the questions you should be asking. Instead you’re too busy wondering what Karate Kid would be like if he was Will Smith’s son. [HolyTaco]
Harrison Ford teaming with JJ Abrams for… a comedy? Comedy’s not their usual thing, but the last Indiana Jones was pretty hilarious. [Empire]
First look at Mickey Rourke in 13. Needs more chihuahua, I think. The Stath’ is also in this movie, which makes me happy *down there*. [/Film]
The Phantom is getting a reboot. For shame. There is only one Phantom and his name is BILLY ZANE. [RopeofSilicon]
Atom presents “The best toys for nurturing psychopaths.” Surprisingly they left out the obvious “a priest’s dick.” …Too far? [Atom]
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I rebooted a phantom this morning. Felt like I was giving birth to a grapefruit, yet nothing on the TP.
In other news, local tin pot radio was reporting earlier that Eddie Murphy has landed the role of The Riddler in the next Batman movie. Not found (or looked for) any evidence to back this bullshit up as yet.
Meh, it was those lunatics at The Sun.
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/article2048300.ece
Fun while it lasted.
Charlie, I heard that, too, but it was being rebuked by a local movie critic. Either way, what an awesome rumor.
I expected that story to be top listing today, actually.
When I first read the headline, I was a little reluctant to watch the video for fear that I’d get some sort of sausage-bondage porn.
It’s good to see Cruise break out that same self-deprecating humility that got him the Golden Globe nomination for best supporting actor in Tropic Thunder.
The robin thing sounds stupid, but when I imagine Eddie Murphy as the riddler, a little bit of poop comes out of my mouth. In a good way.
Congratulations, Scientology, your prophet can barely read.
Dor sho gha! Kahless’ prophet can barely stay sober, or go 5 minutes without whoring His blog!
Not to cut Mr. Mapother any slack in his reading of the Top 10 card, but it’s well-documented that he was (is?) dyslexic.
And c’mon, that “laughing fit” was warranted…that Vicks Vaporub joke was pretty funny.
Billy Zane’s Phantom looks like a Hentai Barney the Dinosaur.
You’re Tom Cruise’s overzealous dad, aren’t you?
Billy Zane’s Phantom looked like erswi in his pajamas.
You’re right, Film Father. Whatever were we thinking?
The problem wiff the Sun’s Batman article is that they’re reporting that LePoeuf will be Robin and Bale will reprise Wayne/Batty. Bale has already said that he will not be Batman if they make a Batman and Robin.
SONOFABITCH! HOW THE HELL DID VINK GET A PICTURE OF ME IN MY PJ’S?
You know who would make a good riddler? Dabney Coleman.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8w4AEu_C1U
I had no idea this existed until Vern at AICN reviewed it. I had to see the trailer to prove it was real. It is. OMG. OMG. It looks soooo bad. And Seagal looks soooo bloated.
Also, I’m still of a mind David Tennant should be the Riddler. Even more so than Depp actually.
Jess, if Steven Segall were to become a zombie and feast on brains sometime during the course of that flick I would cream my fuckin jeans!
What? That Dursted? Fuck you guys.
Batman’s newest Batcave defense mechanism? A moat.
Is FilmFather going to beat us?
And everyone knows Vicks Vaporub cures blue balls.
There is a new up, but…Sweet Kahless…please avoid it.
The active ingredients in Vicks Vaporub are THC and rawhide.
Joker, hasn’t he already done that? Isn’t the secret ingredient in his energy drink Brain?