BOX OFFICE: HOLLYWOOD HATES YOU
12.15.08
Scientists cautiously approached a screening of Four Christmases
The Day the Earth Stood Still took the top spot at the box office this weekend, earning $31 million, despite kinda sucking a lot. It’s not surprising considering it was the only film opening in wide release with any hype behind it. Meanwhile, all the award-season films performed well in limited release.
The biggest winner among openers on a per-screen basis was Clint Eastwood’s “Gran Torino,” …which grossed $284,000 on six screens for an average of $47,333. Also opening strong were Miramax’s “Doubt,” with $525,000 on 15 screens, and IFC’s “Che” with $60,000 on two screens. …“Slumdog Millionaire,” $2.2 million on 169 screens; Focus’ “Milk,” $2.6 million on 328 screens; and Universal’s “Frost/Nixon,” $630,240 on 39 screens. [LA Times] (full top ten after the jump)
So basically, every awards-nominated movie got a tiny release while most of the country was stuck with f-cking Keanu Reeves. Note to studio execs: if you ever want the film industry to become less of an insular circle jerk than it already is, STOP ASSUMING EVERYONE OUTSIDE OF NY AND LA IS AN IDIOT. Making it hard to see the good shit doesn’t “build buzz”, it builds a negative attitude towards moviegoing in general. Example? I tried to see Milk three times this weekend. Every time it was sold out. And I live in New York. Next time I’ll probably just wonder if I should even bother. Great marketing strategy. Go F yourselves.
1. The Day the Earth Stood Still 31.0 million
2. Four Christmases 13.2 million
3. Twilight, 8.0 million
4. Bolt, 7.5 million
5. Australia, 4.2 million
6. Quantum of Solace, 3.8 million
7. Nothing Like the Holidays, 3.5 million
8. Madagascar, 3.2 million
9. Milk, 2.6 million
10. Transporter 3, 2.2 million

I tried to see milk this weekend but the bitch wouldn’t move the baby.
Spoiler Alert: The Day The Earth Stood Still was fucking terrible unless you’re a huge fan of locusts and/or LG phones.
I seriously would have rather had been stuck fucking Keanu Reeves.
By the way, and I can’t stress this enough, Bolt was fucking terrible.
Vince, I’ll help you see “Milk”.
*wink, wink, hip thrust, hip thrust*
Things I should have done other than seeing TDTESS:
Watched the original on mute and saw if it synched up with any Pink Floyd Albums.
Finish writing my Christmas cards.
Let that kid out of the freezer.
I wish the next Friedberg/Seltzer movie would only open in New York and L.A.
Vince, you tried to see Milk? What are you, some kinda fahkin queeah? Hahden up!
Sony is pissed that Gran Torino stole the name of their new moped racing game.
Veence has an Emile Hirsch fetish.
STOP ASSUMING EVERYONE OUTSIDE OF NY AND LA IS AN IDIOT.
Why fore you say that? My take angry with yourself, Big Thum person.
I’m pretty sure Hollywood hates everyone outside of the industry. They just hate New Yorkers and LA folks slightly less.
But I live in NYC, and lemme’ tell you, we’ve got just as many idiots up here. The other night, one of my co-workers went to a sold-out screening of Twilight. TWILIGHT. ‘Nuff said.
My mom wants me to take her to see TDTESS, because she liked the original. I have tried to explain to her than Keanu Reeves is going to shit all over her memory of that classic movie. She retorts, “He’s supposed to be a good actor!”
Well done, Hollywood marketing. *slow clap*
Now, back to zany Klingon antics!
Dor sho gha! Ker’Splatt has Tribbles…UP HIS ASS!
Patty-The Mighty Feklahr was first in line for “Spaced Invaders” when He was 13!
I watched the original on AMC the other night. I seriously sat there and wondered why Hollywood continues to be so unoriginal. Are we seriously out of ideas for a new alien movie? I look forward to watching Zac Efron and Anthony Anderson in an Independence Day remake in 12 years.
I’m guessing Vince has never been anywhere but NY and LA.
New up, with jokes.
Dirty little secret: I saw She’s All That. IN THEATERS.
As i was leaving work Friday, one of the techs here told me that Relativity Films is remaking “The Crow”, so i sat at home with a bottle of Evan Williams egg nog and cried all weekend.
Evan Williams is a son of a bitch!
He made my best friend think it was a good idea to make out with a stranger then spit beer on me.
Good times, great oldies.
BTK, instead of going to theatres (even though I’m in the NY area), I may or may not have eaten shrooms and watched The Dark Knight for the 10th time…