THIS COULD BE YOU, ACE VENTURA JR.
11.25.08The trial of Lillo Brancato Jr., who once earned raves opposite Robert DeNiro and Chazz Palminteri in A Bronx Tale, began yesterday in New York. Brancato was with a friend who killed a police officer during a botched attempt to steal pills from a Bronx apartment after a night of drinking at a strip club in 2005.
By law, prosecutors were allowed to charge Brancato, 32, with second-degree murder in the death of Officer Daniel Enchautegui because they say the killing occurred while both he and the actual shooter were committing a felony — a break-in. If convicted of murder and burglary, he faces a possible life term.
Enchautegui, who lived next door to the apartment where prosecutors say Brancato and Armento were trying to steal drugs, grabbed his gun and came out to investigate. Armento shot the 28-year-old officer in the heart. Enchautegui fired back, wounding both men. [Yahoo]
Brancato should be convicted because it was his acting career that pretty much guaranteed something f’d up would happen. If you ask me, the shooter and the victim were just innocent bystanders in all this. That we continue to produce child actors is just insane. It’s like giving a pit bull a knife. The producers of the movie should be charged whenever a child actor commits a felony. That way, the makers of Ace Ventura Jr. can’t keep destroying the moral fabric of society without consequences. In related news, my moral fabric is crotchless. Peekaboo!



murder and burglary
If he’d only done a song and dance routine while committing the crime, he’d really have been a Renaissance Man.
*gets good seat in corner*
The good news is that the SAG strike will open the doors for so many new wide-eyed child actors to earn roles at toilet wages, thus ensuring a future of, “Hey, remember that one kid? Went rape crazy at a rabbit farm.”
His nickname in prison is going to be “A Bronx Tail”
Am I the only one saddened by this news since A Bronx Tale is one of my favorite movies of all time? I am?
Oh, well then fuck this kid and I hope he dies.
His next film will be Lillo and Snitch.
*prepares bagels and piss boots for corner duty*
Yes, yes you are, Erswi.
You know what drove me nuts about Bronx Tale? Calogero. Why couldn’t his name be something simple like Tony Bologna or Frankie Meatballs?
Instead of prison, they could really punish him and make him be in another movie with DeNiro, maybe Rocky & Bullwinkle 2 or a Ben Stiller “comedy”.
I hope some big ol convict walks up to him on day one and thumps him in that mole but good! That’ll learn him.
Wait, I thought he was acquitted because his getaway car didn’t have positraction.
Brunsy, that’s why they called him C. It wasn’t for some plot device or what not. It’s because nobody on set could pronounce Calogeno.
Also why Chazz Palmentieri isn’t allowed to write anymore.
Banner pic: “You see? Now THAT’s how you do a popcorn trick.”
When a former child actor goes to prison, do the convicts draw straws as to who gets to rape him first?
Turns out they just forgot to pay for a can of tuna.
My moral fabric is cotton. Because it breathes, you know? Hey fuck you man! I live in the fucking South! Do you have any idea how fucking hot and muggy it is down here? No you don’t!
Just another in the sad tale of child stars gone wrong. Think Dana Plato, Todd Bridges, Danny Bonaduce, and you know, that kid who was on “The Facts of Life” and grew up to become Saddam Hussein. I think her name was Mindy Cohn.
Erswi, I honestly can’t relate.. we’re in day 3 of a 4 day snowstorm here. That said, my moral fabric is wool- and its itchy as hell
Makes sense, Juan. I think Lillo was dating Tutti.
My moral fabric is strawberry flavored edible latex.
Can Semtex be considered a fabric?
New up.