CHUD today has a couple new pictures from JJ Abrams’ Star Trek movie (totally sweet trailer here). No word yet on exactly what this is, but it looks like a vastly magnified version of the things I’m afraid will crawl up my pee hole while I’m sleeping.
[RobertHood via CHUD]
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That’s a Sabre-toothed vagina. My Mom told me about it but I didn’t think it was true…..
Lince-to clarify, these creatures are the “maQDar”, a Klingon equivalent to the Terran “Bogeyman”. The real zinger is that we throw children when they reach the age of plaQta (5) into a dark room filled with these fucking things…you know, to help give them a healthy dose of respect for their elders!
“Mommy, mommy, there is a maQDar under my bed!”
“I know dear, your father put it there. Just kill it and go to sleep!”
“But I don’t want to be a warrior, I want to be a DIPLOMAT!”
“DOR SHO GHA!” BLAM!!!
“Father, why did you kill mother???”
“She had obviously been unfaithful, no son of mine would want to be a diplomat. Now, go kill the maQDar, or go live on the streets!”
Pictured: Klingon Hentai
definitely a case of vaginal dentitis…or whatever that shit is in ‘teeth’
Isn’t that the hooker from the beginning of “Wicked City”?
I didn’t know Eva Longoria was in this.
Al, shut the fuck up.
Looses repressed inner Trekkie
I really hope this doesn’t end up a total fuck-a-rama. The franchise could use a rethinking an fresh take. I started wavering at IV, great concern by Generations, totally given up at Insurrection. Who knows, maybe Gaygay can get it going again.
/rerepresses inner Trekkie
Fuck this shit!!
Abrams seems to be going for some crossover between Lost and Star Trek
Lost in Space?
Cloverfield 2?
As bad as shakey-camera-action-sequences, quick-cut-blurry-shit-flying-around-to-much-happening-to-catch-give-me-fucking-epilepsy-for-fuck’s-sake CGI sequences.
Fuck you Armageddon!
Jack!, bite me.
This maQDar did way to much crank. Only two teeth left there twiggy, thinking about giving it up yet?
That thing is what happens when you give modeling clay to the son of the head of creature effects. Lizards are too fucking difficult to model, so you get snake-monsters.
{Pops open beach chair, cracks a beer, waits for make up sex to begin}
You gotta fight first kiddies!
I’m soooo gonna make that fucker in Spore and terrorize some populations with it.
Aslan + Lunch = My plans
Scary snake monsters give good head.
I dont know why, because I love some Trek, bu I just am not interested in this.
Second, Eibz.
I ♥ Crapbasket. He
completes,fills, gets me.By second, do you mean sex?
With the lack of any apparent eyes, one has to assume this thing hunts by smelling teh ghey on it’s prey?
By second I mean 18 of how many I will last in the sack. I haven’t been laid in months now. Fucking kids!
So that’s what the smoke monster looks like under the smoke!
Aw Erswi – now that she finally gave birth, I’m SURE you’ll be having sex ALL THE TIME!
Runs off giggling… (DOES NOT HAVE KIDS)
erswi-His wife must be having “sympathy-lack-of-interest” with your wife…
Abrams loves him some big scary monsters attacking young, succulent, baby faced boys.
new up, btk
As it’s a generally held view that the even number Star Trek movies are the better ones, this reboot has got its work cut out in order to be the exception that tests that rule. Nice monster though.
I’m gonna have to agree. This is basically Cloverfield 2 in space with fancy star ships and added sci-fi effects.